Selfish Teenagers - Rant

[Niceguy2]

Just needed a rant really.

Asked DD (14) the other day if she'd move my plate after dinner. Apparently I was being unfair and only did it after I shouted at her!

Today, I asked her to make me a cup of tea. Apparently I was being unfair and sodded off to her room to try and avoid it.

I then tried to go in and express how disappointed i was and point out how selfish she was being. But of course I was told I'm overreacting and making a big deal out of it. "God its only a cup of tea!"

So after dinner tonight I made her wash up. Naturally this was so unfair she had to cry about it and do it with minimal effort.

Apparently I am not a good dad and when I asked what a good dad does then, she replied "How would she know?"

This is despite the fact that this week alone, I've bought her 3 iPhone cases, drove her to school twice and picked her up because of the weather. Taken her shopping and bought her a new school coat. Run her friend to the local outlet village. Picked them up and took them to Meadowhall instead afterwards. We had takeout Friday night, sat. night and treated us all to a new Kinect last week.

Yes I'm a real ogre! She's now sulking in her room no doubt bemoaning to her friends how bad I am whilst using the bandwidth I pay for!

Rant over!

[toomanytimes]

Niceguy2

I share your feeling's had a cry this morning, DD also 14 is horrible, had an awful week with her attitude, yesterday, gave her money to go and but a coat for school and new shoes as the ones she has are totally ruined again, (this is because she insists on buying rubbish and will not compromise on shoes, been there and they still sit there in her room), all we asked was a receipt for these two as we had given her £40, but that was too much to ask, the coat is not weatherproof and shoes look as though they will not last 5 minutes. She got physically and verbally abusive last night to both me and DH, he really kept his cool despite her hitting him over and over again, this was because we said that she will not have any money to go and buy clothes if she cannot do the one thing we asked. I am totally fed up with hair dye in the bathroom and make up smeared all along my walls, my towels are all ruined with dye and her attitude is "its just towels" go and buy more and repaint the doors. I go to work, spend all weekend trying to clean the house only for her to make it look awful again. As for asking her to do something, forget it, you be awaiting until next Christmas. She has the attitude of expecting the world owes her something. Anyway, my rant over and yes you sound lovely and they do not appreciate it. Parenting is never easy, I suppose we just have to get through it, hoping it will get better in time. Hope you have a good week.

[Niceguy2]

Glad I am not the only one! I usually get "God! You make me out to be evil! You should see
My friends!" to be fair I'd despair if some of her friends were mine!!!

Do you give your DD an allowance? Cos if she kept ruining my stuff, I'd take it out of her allowance. Of course I'm terrible for doing it.

I'm sure one day our kids will return to being normal but for now, let's rant away!!!

[palomadove]

I feel your pain! Remember the terrible twos? It's the same thing again, but with bigger toddlers... testing boundaries, attention seeking, learning how to grow up - and it's exhausting.

DD2 was premenstrual last week and a nightmare - she's back to her sweet self today.

My advice is to pick your fights, keep setting and enforcing boundaries, be consistent with penalties (removing her phone, lock on bedroom door and even, in extreme circumstances, the door itself - has worked - now even the threat of some of these is effective).

And give her a cuddle every day, whether she wants it or not! It does pass, but I think they still forget they're young adults and expect to be waited on like babies!

DD1, who's now 18, can still be staggeringly selfish - and neither of them see things like we've run out of milk, or the bin is crammed full, or the bathroom full of empty shampoo bottles.

My answer to "it's not fair, so-and-so is allowed to do x" is "well go and live in so-and-so's house then."