Resident Step Parent - PR?

[MrsChiefTyrell]

My two young step children now reside primarily with me and their Father and our daughter. My partner works full time and I am a stay at home mum to all of the children. They have a Mother whom they see on alternate weekends.

Things are very hostile between my partner and his ex and she absolutely despises me. She has previously tried to physically snatch the children from my care (outside of her Court ordered contact time) using the fact she has PR and I do not of course, which is upsetting from everyone and has resulted in Police being called due to her causing a scene in public :(

A new Child Arrangements Order will be made at a Court Hearing in a few months. It will be roughly the same as now just more specific about contact arrangements, it needs to be specific about times and dates and all eventualities as there is absolutely zero communication between my partner and his ex (she refuses to even receive emails about the children).

We have been advised by his Solicitor that if the Child Arrangements Order states my name alongside his as with whom the children reside I will automatically get PR for the children and that we should seriously consider that as something he may wish to request at Court given that I am the stay at home parent and I do most school runs/liaise with school, GP visits, dental appointments etc.

Does anyone have any experience of this? Would this be helpful given the children live with us or would it be entirely pointless? Would the Judge even consider it or is it not the done thing when the child's non resident parent has regular contact?

Thank you.

[LudoDown]

I'm a SP with PR granted through the courts at a child arrangements order.

My DSC's mum has limited supervised contact and the PR issue was pushed forward by social services and the Judge through court as they felt is was the best option for the children's ongoing safety.

I'm not a stay at home parent and it does make things a bit easier regarding school, appointments etc. however I feel the only real situation that would make PR really matter is if DH and I split. I would be able to apply to court directly for contact with DSC and also in the eventuality that DH were to die, it would be a loss let messy and complicated for the children to remain in my care.

It's slightly different here though, as the children would not be allowed to return to their mum under any circumstances due to safeguarding concerns. I think that's why the Judge was so in favour of granting me PR.

[wheresthelight]

I think a lot depends on the reasons behind why they reside with their dad and you. if there are safeguarding issues then I can't see why the courts wouldn't grant you PR as you are doing all the donkey work and thence taking them to appts etc.

at the end of the day it doesn't do any harm to ask the courts the question

[yellowdaisies]

I think it depends on the role that you take, rather than whether they have regular contact with their DM or not. She wouldn't lose PR just by you getting it, you'd all three have it.

On a practical level I've not found it necessary, but I'd only be taking the DSC to emergency appointments (until one of their parents could be contacted). If you're doing the routine stuff too it might be helpful. GPs can I think sometimes want to be sure you have PR. Schools are generally more relaxed and will talk to anyone who's acting as a parent or carer regardless of legal status.