not using a solicitor and contact issues

[MsColouring]

Have also posted in legal and lone parents to try and get a range of responses.

A bit of background:

Me and ex split three and a half years ago. Divorce finally came through last month and I paid off what I hoped would be the last legal bill to my solicitor.

Last year my ex took me to court to try and get a shared residence order and have the children 50:50. He lost, but at court a contact order was drawn up, eow, half the holidays, alternate Christmases - the usual. Things seemed to settle for a while but since last September (when my dp moved in) he has been really difficult. E.g. After a genuine mix up over contact weekends he called the police saying I was denying contact, he tried to twist the words of the contact order to say he should have the children Christmas day and Boxing day and he took the children to NI over Christmas without telling me despite me repeatedly asking him whether he was taking them. He has also denied phone contact.

He has repeatedly gone to his solicitor whenever things haven't gone his way, even when I've attempted to reason with him so I have had to get my solicitor to respond in an attempt to get things resolved.

A couple of months ago I received a letter from his solicitor looking for clarity on a number of issues (which I had already given my ex a direct response to) and trying to get me to sign an irrevocable consent for him to take the children to NI. My solicitor responded saying I would not sign the consent because I have never denied consent - just asked for clarification on when he was taking them and for him to let me know that they have got there safely.

I had another letter last week over something else to do with the court order (court order says the last 2 days of the holidays should be with me - he wants this only to be the summer holidays, it has always meant summer, Easter and Christmas). As well as this, summer dates have not been resolved - he told me dates, I asked for a couple to be changed, he said he would think about it then didn't give me an answer. I asked him again, he said he needed to contact his solicitor and he hasn't got back to me. I texted him last night with what I think is a very reasonable compromise - no response.

He does not return texts. The only communication is through the contact book.

I am tired of it but I cannot afford, and do not think it should be necessary to use my solicitor every time he has an issue.

So I am thinking that I might start to bypass my solicitor and start responding to his solicitor directly. I was wondering if anyone has experience of doing this and if anyone can give me any advice please.