My DSD (7) lives with me and my dh. She has lived with dh since about the age of 1. she has had varying degrees of involvement with her mother during this time - initially one afternoon a week, then for the last couple of years, overnight once a week, twice in holidays. The arrangement has always been that her mother just needs to contact and providing we have nothing already arranged, she could have her. This was ok(ish), although we had some difficulties as she could never grasp the concept that as we both work full time, she needs to let us know in advance when she wants her or at least what her working schedule is so that we can book the childcare we need.
Anyway, recently she has broken up with her boyfriend, and moved out of our area. She did not tell us this, the first we heard of it was when dsd came home one day crying because she 'wouldn't see mummy any more'. We reassured her that this wasn't the case... but couldn't do much more as we had no idea at all what was going on.
'Mummy' has now moved approximately 20 mins down the road... not far, I know, but this is the woman who couldn't see her daughter when she lived a 5 minute walk away... She has been living here since xmas and has not seen dsd since 3rd January. She has text us a couple of times since saying sorry she hasn't been in touch, but with no dates or even vague ideas about when she will next be seeing her. We have tried to call her to discuss this but never any answer or returned calls, and all we ever get is a text saying that she's working.
DSD has come home from school today in tears asking when she will next see her, I had to say I didn't know but that I was sure mummy would see her as soon as she can and that she is missing her too... we then tried to phone so she could talk to her but no answer (I should point out here that DSD has not even had a phonecall from her in all these weeks)... I understand that she's going through a big change but what on earth am I supposed to say?! I don't want her to realise that mummy can't be bothered to fit her in but I cannot give her any idea of when because it could be tomorrow, it could be next month! What would you do??
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Don't know what to say... some advice from some more experienced would be great
7 replies
Fairy130389 · 21/01/2013 17:02
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