parents, teachers and special needs

[oxocube]

I am a teacher in a reception/group 1 class and have concerns about a child in my class who, in my limited experience, seems to be dispaying some of the symptoms of autism. The teacher who had this child last year has left and there are no written records of her concerns although I do know she was thinking along the same lines as me and my colleague. Mum is lovely, very open and friendly and easy to talk to. I have heard that Dad was very defensive and refused to recognise that there could be a problem, saying that any problems were simply because of age and that his son would grow out of them.

The kind of things which concern me include anxiety, fidgiting - in fact, constant bobbing up and down, obsessive and repetitive behaviour eg listening to the same song/story tape again and again, for weeks on end, a dislike of any kind of touching inc holding hands with other children, obsession with rules, dislike of any change to routine to a point where he breaks down in tears if we decide to do x before y as usual. Clarity of speech is also a concern.

As I said, I will obviously discuss my concerns with the SENCO as I don't have experience in this field but what is the best way to approach the parents? How did you feel as parents of special needs kids when the class teacher/nursery teacher raised these kind of concerns? Was it a relief to have your own concerns recognised or did you feel very defensive?

Any help or advice would be very gratefully received.

[theheadgirl]

My daughter has ASD and DS, and I was the one who initially had concerns about ASD at about age 3, when her communication started to regress. With hindsight there were other behaviours too. I say that I was the one who had concerns, I don't know if other professionals did too, no one approached me. However when I voiced my concerns to our SALT, and she listened and agreed there was something in it, well I felt a mixture of relief and extreme sadness. No anger at the SALT. That was the beginning of the process of getting DD3 the help she needs, and I wish I'd done it sooner. I think you need to liase with your SENCO, and voice your concerns to the Mum initially, explaining what the next steps are to help her son. Good luck.

[twocutedarlings]

I can only echo what headgirl says, My DD is 5 and she has Aspergers, i was the first to notice that my DD was abit differant to her peers. When DDs Preschool first agreed with me that DD did have some sort of problems i was really upset to start of with but afterwards it was a big relieve.

She was assessed over the summer and was diagnosed this week. She started school last week and school have just put inplace a visual aid timetable for her, its early days as they have only started to use it today but it sounds brilliant, so im hopeing that it will help my DD settle into school better as she to has smiliar problems to the young boy in your post.

Good Luck xx

[oxocube]

theheadgirl, thanks so much for sharing that.

[oxocube]

twocutedarlings, I'm glad that your dd has had a diagnosis which will help her in school. I remember well the class teacher who told me that my daughter had to repeat a year (year 2) and that she was failing in school. It came as a total shock to me - sounds stupid but I had no idea that her reading and spelling were so poor. She had hidden the poor reading very well as she has a very good memory and lots of the text was predictable. she is still in a special needs group for language and being tested for dyslexia.

I was shocked and hurt - that sounds so stupid, but I felt like it was my failing as a parent and that I had let her down. I desperately don't want the parents of the little boy in my class to feel like that.