I'm starting to wonder whether my 2.8yo DD has difficulties with sensory processing. If anyone has experience with this, I'd really appreciate your opinion on whether I should worry, or whether this is OK and just DD's character.
Things I've noticed (some concerning, some seem to suggest there's no problem) :
- Noise:
She's very sensitive to noise. She'll often put her hands over her ears, cry, say it's too loud and try to run away from loud noise. This is not only from obvious ones like hand dryers, hoovers and drumming time at music class, but also eg if a single child is banging on the table next to her.
However she's usually able to cope with noisy playgroups and soft play (although will occasionally take herself off to a quiet corner). I get the impression that if she's really interested /keen on something, it doesn't bother her so much. When she was little, she used to startle very easily, but not so much now.
(She also can't stand having water on her ears.)
- Eating:
We've always had big problems with eating, although I recognise that this is probably a control thing. She seems to have problems with texture rather than flavour (She likes some strongly flavoured foods as well as bland ones like bread - although not very many in total). She doesn't seem to notice she's hungry: I have to time food carefully since she will get past hunger and into meltdown (at which point there's no way of getting anything into her) without seeming to go through hunger.
- Contact:
She's very, very cuddly with her loved adults, and also enjoys rough-housing and tickle games.
She tolerates physical contact with children, but she doesn't seek it and is very rarely physically aggressive (eg will stand to the side to let children pass her at the playground if it's busy; and although she will grab or protect a toy, I've never seen her hit or push a child 'just because' ).
The exception is when she is overwhelmed or ill, when she absolutely can't tolerate physical closeness to other children and will freak out if they invade her space.
- Gross motor skills:
She crawled/walked/scooted/climbed early and is very physically competent and confident - unusually good balance and physical grace. (I know that sensory disorders often seem to go with motor skills problems: certainly not the case for DD).
She is rarely still actually: even when 'sitting' at the table, she's usually kneeling /half dancing /balancing off the edge of the table with her legs dangling.
- Adaptability:
She has always had more difficulties with separation than most others her age. When she was younger, she struggled with new situations (would cry for at least the first term of a new class for example). However she seems to find this easier now that she's older.
On the other hand, she's very flexible about routine: eg loves day trips and going on holiday, and despite being aware of our usual daily routine (asks for things at about the right times), she doesn't mind at all if things change.
- Clothes:
Although she would far rather be naked and barefoot, she doesn't seem to have any real difficulties with sensitivity to clothing. Has never commented on sock seams or labels.
- Empathy:
She's very empathic and caring (eg will get a child's special toy or mother if he is crying). Particularly sensitive to negative emotions: since quite small, she's always picked up on downturned mouth pictures in books, and asks 'what's wrong with x' if anyone exclaims or looks annoyed.
- Toilet training:
She toilet trained easily, but it had to be completely on her own terms. Ie she wouldn't (and still won't) sit on a toilet /potty at my request, but within days she consistently told me when she needed to go, and had few accidents. She generally needs a light touch and fairly flexible parenting, although she is sensible and co-operative if you handle her right.
- Sleep:
Sleep was terrible for the first year, but is now fine. She has a solid bedtime, and often sleeps through. We do end up co-sleeping part of the night fairly often though. She LOVES co-sleeping: there's always at least some physical contact (a little foot or an arm) and fully cuddled up a lot of the night.
10. Speech:
Her speech is fine - slightly late to start speaking, but now probably a bit above average.
Thank you for reading such a long message! I really appreciate any opinions.