Is my son autistic?

[Shootingstar2289]

My son is 4 soon and he is severely speech delayed. He says many words and sometimes puts them together into simple phrases but not nowhere near where he should be for his age. He didn't say more than a few words until 3.5. He didn't point or wave until about 2-3.

He is a very happy, giggly, cuddly child. Often too affectionate as always wants a 'cuddle'. He is very loving - never been at all aggressive at home or at pre-school.

He prefers to play alone at pre-school. He seems to like the company of other children but doesn't actually play with them. They say he often has trouble sharing and taking turns. Sometimes he sits down nicely for story or snack time but other times he doesn't want to know.

He can be sensitive to loud noises. He used to petrified of hoovers (got used to it now) and my old food mixer. He is still petrified of hand dryers in the toilet.

He has been dry day and night for around 3 months, he was considerably later to train but never had accidents now.

He hates queuing, he often runs off and has no sense of danger (running into roads and I've had to grab him)

Being obessed with buttons - cash machines, parking ticket machines, door opening buttons, chip and pins and anything else he can reach - in public. Once he wanted to play with the recpetionists phone in the dentist (sigh). Also obsessed with opening and shutting doors, light switches and water (he loves to get drenched while playing with water or in the sea)

He screams a lot when he doesn't get his own way.

I can take him anywhere, where there are no distractions - the woods, quiet parks, country walks and trails. Take him somewhere where it's loud and busy with noise and buttons to press - nightmare. He has had me in tears and although he's never aggressive, he likes to get his own way and screams when he doesn't.

He screams in shops when the checkout lady scans our goods, thinking she's not going to give them back.

He's under speech therapy (poor in our area though), seen a pediatrician twice (first time they said it was just a general speech delay), seen the senior senco for our area and is seeing an educational psychologist in the next week.

Any advice?

[chocnomorechoc]

are you still under the paed? has ever anybody suggested an Ados? have you raised your concerns about asd with the paed?

if all fails, have you considered going private? you should't have to but many do when the become frustrated with the Nhs

[Shootingstar2289]

Pediatrician is seeing him again next month after the last app a few months ago. I feel like they are shrugging me off. My son always ends up VERY WELL behaved at his appointments so they don't see what he's like on a day to day basis. When he is good he is very good, when he wants his own way - he's a nightmare. He is very good at home. I have no concerns for him at home. I don't have to watch him constantly.

[Firsttheyignoreyou]

There are certainly enough red flags in your post to have concerns and realistically, that is what you are saying: you are worried.

He is certainly showing sensory difficulties, has language delay/disorder, the social communication issues may result from that or be part of an ASD profile.

Advice - play to his strengths so walking, swimming, get him things with buttons so he can play. Build language around his interests - I bet you are doing all of this already.

Meanwhile, push to have him assessed further. Use the ed. pysch visit for that. SALT works - ask for them to deliver a programme that makes a difference. Ask how will they ensure progression, and if what they are offering doesn't work, what do they plan next. If they haven't got anything, you will probably need a ECHP to be able to fight his corner and get what he actually needs. Or go private for it.

I liked the "The out of sync child." for explaining the sensory difficulties but the NAS has good info, too
www.autism.org.uk/living-with-autism/understanding-behaviour/the-sensory-world-of-autism.aspx

Love the cuddly bits - and yes, a child on the spectrum can be very tactile; in fact, I think my DS2 uses touch and closeness as a coping mechanism.

[stopgap]

I must tell you that my son (3.8) is one of the most affectionate children you could ever wish to meet. Despite having lousy eye contact, he is an expert at reading people's faces and emotions, and knows exactly how to cheer you up. He also prefers certain environments over others, and some (a roomful of singing people) can send him into the worst meltdowns. He has a ton of sensory sensitivities, and most of all is rigid about routines, to the point that deviating from them, even slightly, will cause tremendous anxiety and tears. He was diagnosed with autism two months ago. His language is normal to advanced for his age, but his pragmatic speech (ability to form a back-and-forth conversation) is a struggle. In a garbled way, I'm trying to say that no two children with autism behave the same way. I would definitely push for further assessment.

[AntiquityIsDotDotDot]

Your ds sounds a lot like mine! ds got his diagnosis on his third birthday.

For the paed I would (and did) look at the Triad of Impairments and map ds's issues onto them. So headings and an explanation of every behaviour he had which fitted them.

Your son is a little old for the MCHAT but this PDF shows critical items in bold and late pointing is under a critical skill.

I know it seems a bit forward to kind of present a diagnosis, but sadly I think it's a necessity to be educated and informed yourself so you know what are the important things to bring up and so you can present the overall picture to them.

You can't go wrong by parenting your child as if they do have autism.