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when to ditch the dummy

6 replies

bebobaggins · 09/04/2008 21:03

DD is 14 weeks and has a dummy at night but not in the day, (she usually naps in the buggy and it's the movement that sends her off). I'm starting to worry about her getting "addicted" to the dummy to sleep. I really don't want to be fighting a big battle later on. She's very sucky and would gladly spend most of the day and night on my boob so the dummy was a life saver when we started using it a few weeks ago. So the question is when should I ditch it? and how? the earlier the better? the HV today advised around 6 months, but that already seems quite late to me. By the way she's just started teething so right now is probably not a good time...

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gingerninja · 09/04/2008 21:08

My DD gave hers up at 18 months. She did it completely un prompted and prior to that was a total adict and had it lots, especially when teething or ill. One night I was putting her to bed and she gave it to me, turned over and went to sleep. I was gobsmacked but haven't looked back. I thought I'd see how it went for a few days and she was fine, a bit restless at night for a couple of nights but we cosleep so was happy cuddling and that was that.

I had resigned myself to having it until she was old enough to reason with. I figure, you give it to them because it suits you, they learn to love it then you take it away (generally for your own benefit). SO I'd say, either ditch it now or be prepared for the long haul.

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fairylights · 09/04/2008 21:53

i am sure lots of people will reply to this.. but i'll just say that i really never wanted to use a dummy but am really glad that i did now,it was a lifesaver for me when ds was tiny and now when i give it to him it is his sign that its time for sleep - he is 17 mo and just has his to go to sleep, so he is only allowed it in his cot and he understands that. I always thought i would take it away when he was little but there never seemed to be the right time and really, if you make it clear when its allowed (so maybe just for sleep time) then i think its not just ok, its a blessing! I am reckoning now that i will have to wait til i can reason with him (when he about 2 maybe?), unless he does what gingerninja's LO did!
But actually now he is showing signs of not wanting it so much and hands it to me when i go in to his room.
I can totally sympathise with your anxiety, i got SO het up about it but its all worked out ok. I think its only bad for them speech wise if they have it in all day, and i have a relative who is a dentist who says that a dummy is much better for your teeth than a thumb in the long run!

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Seona1973 · 09/04/2008 22:08

I only got rid of ds's when he started waking multiple times for it in the night around 5 months. If he hadnt started waking for it I would have been happy for him to have kept it for longer. SIDs guidelines actually recommend a dummy to help prevent cot death but I couldnt cope with the endless wakings and after a few nights ds slept much better.

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fairylights · 09/04/2008 22:11

aah yes i had forgotten those nights before ds could put the dummy back in himself! that was trialsome... but not as badas seona's experience!much easier these days..

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loucee · 09/04/2008 22:24

Hi

We took DD's dummy away at 6 months because she repeatedly took it out then cried for it back in! She had a couple of nights where we had to pick up then put down but apart from that she was fine.

DS is 15 wks old and he has a dummy, mostly for naps in the day (I'm not doing feeding to sleep this time round) but sometimes at night as well and I'm not at all concerned as we'll just see how he goes with it, might be 6 months or might be 12 but only for nap times

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bebobaggins · 12/04/2008 09:08

Thanks all. (Sorry did my usual thing of asking a question and then going offline for 2 days..) good to know that it's not necessarily a life sentence. what worries me most is that she really can't go to sleep without either dummy or moving in the buggy or being rocked. so I suppose that's what we need to work on. spent half of last night putting it back in, she seems to be particularly unsettled at night at the moment.
Anyway one more question - for those of you that ditched the dummy at 6 months or before, how did you do it? All I can imagine at the moment is hours of yelling and really don't want to do that.