Help! cc not working, has anyone had this experience?

[lilysma]

I've been doing cc with my 6.5 month old dd for 12 days now and the results are extremely up and down. She has been a terrible sleeper from about 3.5 months, waking 4-5 times a night and I gradually stopped feeding her every time and tried to do gradual withdrawal combined with co-sleeping with some success at bedtime but none whatsoever for night wakings, so finally bit the bullet and did cc out of sheer exhaustion.

The first night was horrendous - crying for 1.5 hours, then 1hour, then half an hour. The second and third nights were much better - 3-4 wakings but she settled within 15 mins and sometimes only a few mins. She did a few 5-6 hour stretches over the next couple of nights, which was unheard of, but started waking at 5ish.

Then she suddenly cried for an hour one night and has been much less settled with the exception of a couple of nights ago when she slept 8 consecutive hours! Last night she just couldn't settle herself between 11 and 1 - she kept going silent for up to 20 mins and then crying again, so I fed her and she settled immediately until 5.

I started by feeding her at one middle of the night waking since she's not taking loads of solids yet, but then I thought maybe she was finding this confusing as she always seemed to settle worse at the next waking, so have not been feeding her until 5ish.

So it's a mixed picture, but not at all text book. I'm finding the crying increasingly difficult to take - I don't think a few nights of this would harm her, but am less sure if it goes on and on...

Sorry for the mammoth post, but it's quite compliated! Has anyone had a similar experience? What did you do and how did it work out? Please don't shout at me as I really don't need this!

[cruisemum1]

lilysma - so sorry you are having such a rough time of it. I hope someone can help you and offer support/advice.

[Judy7]

Hi lilysma

I had similar probloems and did cc at 7 months and found the crucual thing was to express a bit of milk on to a breast pad or whatever. I'd put it under his cheek and it really soothed him...quite often he'd go straight off to sleep.

HTH

[BikeBug]

hi lilysma, I'm not sure that I will be any help here, as we gave up on cc on day 5 because the amount of crying was getting worse not better. It sounds like you've made more progress than we ever did, and that things aren't getting progressively worse (which they did for us). I do know someone (in RL) who took a full 2 weeks for cc to work with their lo, so I know it's not always a quick '3 nights' thing. I don't have any answers for you, sorry , but I wouldn't dream of shouting - been there, know what you are going through. I hope things work for you.

[DaddyJ]

lilysma, it's been a mixed bag for you, I am sorry to hear about the long struggle

What is your girl like during the day now? Is there anything during the daytime
that might explain why after your text book first week it all went pear-shaped?

Bikebug, what are you doing at the moment? I hope you are getting some sleep..

Bumping this for both of you.

[lilysma]

Thanks for your replies.

DaddyJ, she may be teething (but aren't they always?! ) Also she had constipation for the last couple of days (poor thing!) but I think it had cleared by last night. She's been quite clingy today but wasn't before - my parents were here for a few days and she was perfectly happy to spend lots of time with them. She's only been in her cot in her room for the past four nights - before that she was in the room she had shared with me. But the 8 hour stretch was in there, so not sure it's relevant. So lots of possibilities but don't know what the upshot is for my strategy!

Am feeling pretty low, but just trying to stay hopeful for tonight .

[oliveoil]

tbh I would not do cc on a baby of this young age, really

they cry to tell you something - hunger, cold, hot, wet, or just a plain cuddle

dd1 slept through from about 4 or 5 months and didn't need a feed in the night, then all of a sudden went through a phase where she had a bottle for about a month - growth spurt? Who knows

dd2 is still in our bed a couple of times a week and she is nearly 3

I know you will get lots of people saying it is fine, but I wanted to give you the other side, no judgement or shouting

imo if she wakes in the night, feed her

[morocco]

agree with oliveoil, not shouting, but I know I did something similar with my ds1 and now massively regret it

[lilysma]

Thanks for your reply, but I really don't think feeding her is the answer as it has taken a lot of agony to wean her off feeding every 2 hours and I really don't think that is necessary at 6 months - she just wants to suck (or at a second best cuddle) to sleep. I know this isn't necessarily 'bad' but I've been there and it was killing me .

[lilysma]

Morrocco, why do you regret it? What happened?

[morocco]

oh nothing terrible, but he cried and cried so much and it took weeks to achieve anything and then it never lasted so it would be back to square one. the experts never seem to mention the fact that there are babies for whom it can take weeks to train then I had ds2 and didn't bother and even though he was terrible for the first 9 months, after that he sorted himself out. now ds1 is still a total nightmare about going to sleep and ds2 is an absolute dream. i get those 'guilt' moments that it is because of early trauma from cc making him insecure about going to sleep. probably he was always going to be a bad sleeper I suppose but you know how we mums like to blame ourselves for everything!

[lilysma]

Thanks for sharing that. This is my great fear but at the same time I got to the point where I just had to try it as I was so tired. The difficulty is when to call it quits and what to do then!

[lilysma]

Also fwiw Oliveoil, I don't think she does cry to tell me anything most of the time - she's just frustrated because she can't get to sleep. She'll only stop with the total comfort of the boob, but I don't really think that's a sustainable habit for either of us...

The difficulty is knowing when that's not the case and when she really does need something

[oliveoil]

well that is it isn't it? You don't know, so personally I can't leave them to cry it out

but I am quite soft so feel free to ignore me!

dd2 is a pain in the arse to be frank, but I would rather her be in my bed then be sick from crying

[DaddyJ]

lilysma, just read your messages and will post reply on the other CC thread - did you see the latest posts on there?

Hope despite all this you enjoyed the weather today

[lilysma]

well, we've had an upturn here - have just posted on another thread. she has slept through the last 4 nights . not sure whether to trust it but will keep you all posted...

[winniepoo]

From what you post cc is working. Try not to stress dd might never be a 12hr sleeper and easy settler - go with the flow but don't give up as you'll regress