10 month old and still not sleeping, am at the end of my teather (again)

[Astrophe]

I've posted about my ds before over the months. He has never slept well, although he seems to be getting worse lately.

We are up 2-5 times a night with him atm, patting, shushing and sometimes picking him up. I am BFing, but very rarely do I feed him during the night. Sometimes when he has been crying for hours, or waking constantly I do feed.

He eats well during the day, and we also offer a cup of formula at night as well as bf, so he's not hungry.

We have tried controlled comforting unsucessfully. He cried constantly for between 4/5 hours for five nights running (only finally went to sleep when we comforted him to sleep). He seems unable to settle himself - once he is winding up its over, unless we settle him again.

I suspect there is nothing we can do. We will try CC again when he is a bit older. In the meantime this is a last ditch effort to find a miracle cure! Please don't post saying we need to let him cry for longer. 5 hours is not acceptable in my book, and we wont be doing it.

Thanks for reading

Astro (but we really need a yawning emoticon don't we?)

[mower]

This must be awful for you astro, but agree with not letting him cry for 5 hours!

DS1 16 months has just gone through a stage of waking in the night and waking up early in the morning, I just don't pick him up out of his cot just stroke his head and put a blanket over him and keep the room dark.

Probably not much help to you, sounds like it is habit with your ds it is finding a way that works for you to break this habit.

[emkana]

I know that many people would disagree with me, but I would advise you to stop all these attempts to get him to settle by himself. He's obviously not ready atm. When he wakes up - just feed him back to sleep! This will mean more sleep for all of you.
I b/fed my dd's at night at this age, it doesn't mean that they will be bad sleepers forever, in time he will be okay and sleep better.

[mower]

Was just thinking how I got ds1 to sleep through. It was when I decided I would not feed him myself during the night anymore and just gave him a bottle of formula. Only took around 3 nights of doing this and when he realised he wasn't going to get that snuggle cuddle at 3 in the morning he just started sleeping through.

Also I gave him formula for his going to bed feed and this seemed to be the key.

I was pregnant with ds2 though at this stage so don't think my milk was as much for him.

[Astrophe]

thanks everyone. its actually a relief to have people say we shouldn't leave him to cry, and that feeding at night is ok, so thanks for that too. Its particularly hard because he is disturbing our 2 yo who is typically a great sleeper.

The only problem with night feeding for us is that one feed seems to lead to another, but then per haps it will still be easier to feed3 times than to be up for an hour trying to settle once.

We are going to buy a white noise CD called 'Sounds for Silence' to see if it helps. Does anyone have experience of this or other similar cds?

[Astrophe]

aaargh - last night was particularly appalling, hopefully due to teeth (he still hasn't got any...at 10 months!). But that still doesn't account for the last 10 months of waking!

[wrinklytum]

Could it be teeth?DS was great but dd is really troubled with teething.She is 13 months.If he is not hungry I would try a cuddle,song,nappy change then put back into bed.Works for dd but she whinges for about 20 mins before nodding off.Oh and capol if is dribbly red cheeked and teething!!!

[BikeBug]

I rely heavily on the nursing/rocking chair I have managed to squeeze into DS's room. We've been following the NCSS with limited sucess, so I know he has a great sleep routine, naps well and even eats decently, but he's just not ready to sleep through. Currently he does about 2 hour stints and needs comforting back to sleep at each waking. I stopped feeding at night over a month ago, and it has made no difference , so now I (or DH) sit in the rocking chair cuddling him until he drops off again. The chair reclines, and I have a spare duvet next to it for warmth, so it is possible to doze while he goes back to sleep. That or I depart to the spare bed with him and co-sleep.

I'm really oddly relieved to hear that your DS didn't respond to CC. That sounds really selfish, sorry, its just that it is so often held up as infalible, and I've always been sure it isn't the right solution for us because DS gets so very worked up, so it is oddly comforting to hear that sometimes a baby can cry for hours and not magically suddenly learn to sleep.

God this is all about me isn't it? What I wanted to say is that I agree, sometimes you just have to go with it and try and make it as painless as possible. Maybe it's to do with the teeth - DS has none either and is also 10 months.

[Scootergirl]

My DS is a rubbish sleeper too at 9 months and we have tried leaving a radio either playing talk radio (although I once left it on radio4 and found him sleeping away to a documentary on abortion in Ghana ) or not quite tuned in so it's white noise and that did work for a bit. I agree re the controlled crying - they're too little for it now.

[puffling]

Maybe you could take him to a childrens'cranial osteopath. I think this is one of the issues they deal with. I know of someone who's baby's sleep problems were helped by treatment. We've also been going to one for dd's ear infections etc. It may be coincidence, but she's not had an infection since going.
Dawnx

[Donk]

DS had slept through twice by the time he was 2.5yrs! CC was definitely not for us - the more you left him the more wound up he got. I just kept on with feeding him back to sleep (and when no longer bf at night) comforting him. Since then, he's still not a great sleeper especially when ill, but he sleeps through more often than not now (just 4yrs), and its slowly improving.

[Astrophe]

thank you all so much. think we will try the osteopathy and the white noises, but failing that it does help to know that others are in the same boat and that CC is not foolproof!

I hope all your LOs do some more sleeping soon.

Bikebug are you on the Feb 06 postnatal thread? If not, pop along to ours - March o6 babies. we are a nice lot!

[puffling]

I've got a March '06 baby too.

[Astrophe]

join us puffling! join us bikebug! If you can't find the right thread in the post natal topic, post here and I will try and do a link

[laundrylover]

Hi Astro, just popping on to the thread to see what advice you got!

Puffling and Bikebug - do join is on the post natal thread and we can whinge about our lack of sleep now and again. It's a very slow moving thread so easy to keep up with!