I don't know when to put baby to bed!

[Courtney91]

My DD is 4.5 weeks old, but I don't know what time I should be putting her to bed. ATM we are putting her down around 10-10:30pm. She has her last bottle 9:30-10pm. She wakes somewhere between 3:30 & 5am for a feed then goes straight back. Then wakes around 8-9am but after she has had a bottle and normally I have got her dressed she is flat out again for a good 3/4 hours, until she wants a lunchtime feed. Should I be putting her down earlier at night so that her long morning sleep is during night/early hours? She is very active in the afternoon/evening with only having around 3 hours worth of naps, over different periods, from around 2 till bedtime. She normally feeds around 4:30pm 6:30pm 8:30pm and then her bedtime bottle and takes between 2oz & 4.5oz at a time. We feed on demand and not concerned and when she wants food, she was a healthy birth weight of 9.2lbs and we got her weighed yesterday she was 10.8lbs. I should also say that she sleep in her own room and has done for birth which is dark at night and when she wakes in the morning I open the curtains to let light and give her lots of cuddles, eye contact and talking to try and get her into the routine that it's morning and play time, but she would rather got back to sleep. Any advice on nighttime sleep patterns/routines would be great. Thank-you

[nosleeptilever]

it's been awhile since mine was wee but considering that she's only 4.5 wks it sounds like you're doing fine the way you're going. baby is too young to have much routine yet, that will probably come in the next few weeks. Then you can try to put her down around 7pm for her first nighttime sleep before next feed.
I made the mistake of trying to 'sleep train' my ds at 4 wks using Gina ford type techniques. I now wish I'd gone with the flow a bit more!
Good luck and congrats on baby

[Courtney91]

Thank-you. Yes we are trying to go with the flow, and what ever make DD happy and content we go with. She is generally a very content baby. I'm just feeling the affects of no sleep, for the first 2 weeks she feed every 2 hours (bottle) and only the last week gone to one night feed, and with DH working 5:30am till 5pm I don't expect him to do any night feeds as needs his sleep a lot more! I feel very lucky to have a DD that goes to sleep on her own (only at night though) but Me and DH were so use to a good 10 hour a night undisturbed sleep before a busy day at work. Hopefully she will start going down earlier soon.

[Imeg]

I definitely found the sleep deprivation the hardest thing about dealing with a baby. It's only now he's 6 months that I feel like I'm getting a sensible amount of sleep fairly regularly. This is not to depress you but maybe just to reassure you that it's normal to find it difficult, and that it may take months rather than weeks for you to get a good stretch of sleep, just so you're not disappointed if it takes some time. But I hope you'll be lucky!

[BingoBonkers]

In the early days and weeks we kept our babies downstairs with us in the Moses basket and took them upstairs when we went to bed.

We didn't introduce a "proper" bedtime routine until about 10-12 weeks and then it would be a 7pm bedtime in the Moses Basket upstairs with a sleep monitor.

The early weeks can be torture. You're Knackered. You're trying to suss feeding routines. The books tell you to look for tiredness cues. You spend your life looking for these invisible cues. Best way to describe it is to go with the flow and you will find your own routine without even trying.

[mewkins]

I have a nearly 12 week old and at 4 weeks he was the same as yours. Was awake (and not feeding for a couple of hours max each day). No pattern whatsoever. No point trying to keep him awake - almost impossible to wake up. At about 6 weeks he got a bit more alert and I could try to keep him awake between 5pm ish and bedtime at 6.30. During that time I would give him a bath, feed and bed so it signalled the start of the night iyswim. Before that stage dh would keep him downstairs with him and I went to bed at 8ish to catch up on sleep.

Only now is ds starting to get into sleep patterns but each day he seems to need different amounts of sleep so still very early days. My main 'rules' are no napping before 8.30am, get up at 7am, no napping after 5pm and bed before 7pm.

[Twinklestar2]

My boy is 5 weeks tomorrow and his pattern is exactly the same as your daughters.

[Iggi999]

I thought I'd misread your OP and she must be 4.5 months old! At one month old she gives not a toss for your distinctions between night and day. I assume you are happy with your arrangement (having her sleep alone) though this is not recommended. Still you'll probably get more sleep that way.

[ColdCottage]

Sounds just about right to me. DS is 4 1/2h months now and we out him to bed when we went until he was around 10 or 12 weeks then started at 9.30pm and worked back. Now it varies between 7.30 and 8.30 but if we are away he just sleeps in his pram and goes to bed when we do.

Don't worry too much, they say the first 8-12 weeks just let things go as they want as if they were still inside you. This is because all babies are born 'premature' in order to pass through the mothers pelvis. If they went to full term it would be another 2 or 3 more months.

Just do what feels right for you. I lay in with mine until 8.30/9.30 so he goes for another sleep after 6/7am feed.

Enjoy them while they are so tiny

[Courtney91]

Thanks all!
I don't know weather this is coincidence or not but DD has been falling asleep earlier the last few nights on her own (DH and myself were washing dinner pots up, everything went a bit quiet checked her and she was flat out on her play gym) but wakes up for a top up feed around 10.30 then is good for the night till 4-30/5-30 am. They only thing that is concerning me now is since doing this she is taking as much milk as was previous. Sometimes only taking 1 oz every 4-5 hours. Or like last night took 3 1/2 oz and then chucked up everywhere. Could she be having a growth spurt and off her milk and just wanting to sleep? She will happily take the bottle but just chews the teats or softly sucks where there is no milk coming out! We have never had a problem with her taking milk before.