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Anyone want to hear my rant? Feeling pretty fed up

(13 Posts)
Ledkr Wed 24-Apr-13 06:22:03

Dd is two and hasn't been the worlds best sleeper but will now often sleep at night.
The trouble is if she does wake in the night say a nightmare or teeth or whatever she will not go back to sleep and gets more and more lively as the night goes on. So last night went down at 7.30 woke at 1.30 and hasn't been back to bed since.
We've tried everything but she just won't go back to sleep so I'm currently sat here with a thumping headache and the vile cold I'm off work with is making a comeback rather than get better.
The only way to avoid this us to simply not go to her in the night which isn't really an option.
Tbh I'm ranting a bit because I'm completely sick of over two years of unpredictable or broken sleep.
Sick of having a headache.
Sick of being moody.
Sick of having bad skin and bags under my eyes.
Sick of not having any energy to live my life as I'd like to.
Sick of eating junk and not having the energy to exercise.
Sick of having to see different drs for poor health when all I need is regular sleep.
Dh is brilliant and would be up all the time if I didn't insist he wasn't.
He works shifts so he does need to rest.
I'm mostly sad that she us my last baby and I've been unable to really enjoy her as I'm too tired and resentful.
I often wish I'd never had her. Isn't that awful?

Sleepybunny Wed 24-Apr-13 07:13:43

God that sounds horrific! I have a six month old who has a similar sleep pattern, I get a couple hours unbroken sleep at the beginning of the night but I could be up from 2ish onwards every hour or just up settling her constantly.

I don't know if she's uncomfortable, but I try to fix all the usual things, hunger, hot/cold, cuddles, just over tired etc. I can't do CC either, I'd hate for her to think I wasn't there for her if she is genuinely suffering.

I would looooove just one night of unbroken sleep.

Sorry no advice, my head is pounding, I'm cranky, and I know how you feel (although I did get some sleep 6 months ago!)

Bearcrumble Wed 24-Apr-13 07:21:59

Oh Ledkr you poor love. Think I was on another thread you started about sleep recently. You must be at the end of your rope.

I don't know what to suggest. Will she nap later today so you can have a lie down? Have you tried a nightlight? Someone on my postnatal group had grrat success with using a placebo and telling her dd it was medicine to help protect her against the thing she was scared of. Don't know if yours would be too young to understand that...

I had many wakings from 1yr old dd and 3 yr old ds got up at 5.30. Bless my dh though he took ds downstairs and later dd too and has just bought me coffee and cereal in bed.

It makes such a difference that I know however shit my night, from 6-8am I get to hand over.

HappyAsASandboy Wed 24-Apr-13 07:42:49

I know how you feel. My DTs are now two an a half and until the last month or so they've woken several times each every night. Exhausted really doesn't cover it, does it?

I find that getting some sleep in a Saturday afternoon every now and then really helps. Seems daft that 4 hours extra sleep a month can change anything, but I think it does. Hand the DCs over to DH and go to bed. If he won't leave you to sleep, then send them out with a do-not-return-until time.

Another very reasonable approach is to spend the night at your friends/parents/hotel so that you get a proper night of off-duty sleep.

TBH I think it is the off-duty type of sleep you need. I used to try to sleep when the babies slept (ha ha! They rarely slept at the same time!), but it somehow isn't the same sleep if you are still the 'responsible adult'. You need some off-duty sleep preferably after a leisurely swim, massage an dinner in a hotel.

Hang in there, this too shall pass ...

Ledkr Wed 24-Apr-13 08:18:34

Thanks. I have never slept well in the day even when I did night shifts.
I am so resentful of her it shames me.
She was a late baby and I was very pleased but she is such hard work I've been unable to enjoy her and I spoil it for dh with my weeping and wailing.
I've got a thyroid condition which is currently under assessment which makes me feel worse and I just need my sleep.
I had four other dc who were a dream compared to her.
She is whiney,determined,strong willed and hyper.
I've often wondered if she's ok but I think that's just me looking for reasons.
I used to be happy and enjoy life and now I'm a fat lazy misery with nothing to look forward to but dealing with her.
Sorry I'm probably sounding horrible but I'm just exhausted.

Ledkr Wed 24-Apr-13 08:19:29

To be honest I just told dh I'm going to take dd1 out if school after sats and have a week in the sun.

Ledkr Wed 24-Apr-13 08:22:37

If she just woke for a reason I'd be ok but it's the not going back to sleep that's terrible. She has been awake since 1.30 and is still going strong.
Dh has work at 2 so needs to go back to bed.

Satine5 Wed 24-Apr-13 21:54:04

Sorry, if this is something you don't want to consider, but have you tried co-sleeping? Do you think that would help at all? Does she seek cuddles when she wakes up? Or putting a mattress on the floor in her room until her sleeping gets better? My DD is not a great sleeper either, 20 months and always wakes up at least once, so I do symphatise!

Ledkr Fri 26-Apr-13 14:33:50

Hi satine.
I put her in with me but she seems to wake up more and kick our heads whilst singing Taylor swift songs (thanks dd1)
She then opened the blind and said "good morning" at the moon hmm
I so wish it worked or I'd be happy to do it.

orangeandemons Fri 26-Apr-13 14:39:52

Ledkr I hd one tht did this when in bed with us. Eventually dh discovered what he called holding her down. I.e lying with an arm across her until she stopped fidgeting and fell asleep.

It was the only way any of us got any sleep. It seems ridiculous that we had to persevere to get her to sleep with us hmm but we did. The only other option was no sleep at all < still remembers her hopping up and down shouting I'm a kangaroo at 3.30 am>

Ledkr Fri 26-Apr-13 14:48:04

Haha. Yes she head butted me by mistake then said "sorry" wasn't laughing at the time.
I ended up downstairs at 4am just letting her get on with things while I watched the following grin

catsdogsandbabies Fri 26-Apr-13 15:08:27

What about a sleep consultant?

Ledkr Fri 26-Apr-13 15:42:54

Have been on the verge of that but her waking isn't consistent or even that often it's just when she does wake we can't get her back off.
Dh and I have agreed a strategy for when it happens again. We will do half each if what's left of the night.
I have a current parathyroid issue which is still being investigated so lack of sleep affects me dreadfully.

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