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Join our Sleep forum for tips on creating a sleep routine for your baby or toddler.

Join our Sleep forum for tips on creating a sleep routine for your baby or toddler.

Sleep

Sort of a Controlled Crying question

16 replies

madmarchscare · 21/10/2005 21:31

DS (23mos) goes to bed 7.30 - 8pm and used to sleep well until at least 8am (used CC quite happily to get to this point). Sometimes had to pop in now and then but didnt really mind that.

Well the popping in has become more and more often, in fact most nights and sometimes 2/3 times (usually between 4 and 6am). He doesnt want to get up as will eventually go back to sleep until normal time.

Thing is, he doesnt start up as soon as I leave the room, its 10-30 mins later (ie; not able to leave it 2 mins, 5 mins, 10 mins and so on)

As I am typing Im thinking to myself 'why dont I just leave him to cry it out?' but Im struggling with it, as I always used to think that at least by going back in and out every so often didnt seem too mean.

He also still naps in afternoon for up to 2 hours if I let him.

What do ya think?

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madmarchscare · 21/10/2005 21:44

OK, stupid question to ask on a friday night, I'll come back later, I need to sleep .

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madmarchscare · 22/10/2005 10:09

So to all you bright eyed and bushy tailed saturday morningers....

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HRHQoQ · 22/10/2005 10:18

Have you tried cutting out the afternoon sleep? IT'll be hard going for the first few days - but he may not need - it DS1 stopped naps (on his own ) at 18 months. And DS2 (22 months) only has a nap now because I put him down for one .

Alternativaly why not start the CC from when he starts crying - so when he first starts (15 minutes after you left him), leave him 2 minutes, then go in and continue as usual?

Donbean · 22/10/2005 10:19

Well,i think that you have answered your own question there, leave him to cry it out.
Apparently it may take up to a week of difficulties but works eventually.
Its teaching them to self sooth isnt it.

Im a total hypocryt though because mine has never slept through the night since birth and im up and down to him most nights now at the very least twice at worst every hour. (he is 2y 3m)
Good luck its awful isnt it

NotQuiteCockney · 22/10/2005 10:20

I think you're trying to get him to sleep too much in the day. I haven't got Ferber to hand, but I'm pretty sure a two-year-old needs a bit less sleep than that. (like an hour less, not loads less)

I'd either move his bedtime later, his waking time earlier, or cut short his afternoon nap. (Or cut it entirely if you like.) Pick the option that suits your schedule best.

madmarchscare · 22/10/2005 11:03

I almost have tears in my eyes at the thought of the afternoon nap diappearing. Its my time, it my MN time fgs.

Ive sort of really only just come to terms with this is what I do and this motherhood malarky is suiting me better at the moment than it has done before. Typical. I think Im delaying the obvious for my own selfish reasons. Not good really is it?

QOQ - Cant really do the CC from then either as he'll stop as soon as I go in for another 20 mins or whatever.

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NotQuiteCockney · 22/10/2005 11:06

Then keep the afternoon nap. It's not inevitable that you lose it now! My DS1 kept napping until he was 3.5!

But you may need to cut back on some of his sleep time, somewhere. Maybe get him up a bit earlier? Or put him down a bit later?

madmarchscare · 22/10/2005 11:37

I think I'll go with cutting back at nap times, say no more than an hour, see what happens. At least its the weekend.

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Donbean · 22/10/2005 11:41

TBH thats what i have done, in fact i have experimented with his nap times for about 2 months now to see what difference it would make to his ability to sleep through and the problem of early morning wakenings.

An almighty wrench to cut down nap time as you so rightly say, that time is your time. Thats how i feel about it too MMS.

madmarchscare · 22/10/2005 13:33

Do you think you could do CC DB?

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Donbean · 22/10/2005 13:37

No because he is in a big boy bed and just stands at his door cying...then i worry about him falling asleep out of his bed....getting cold...hypothermia or falling in the dark and hurting himself.
But then he is my baby and if he is crying there must be something wrong with him, i couldnt ignore that
My problem is he just wakes up and wanders into our room, he has never got into our bed, i march him staight back to bed and he settles, then is back half an hour later
By keeping him going in the day and not letting him have a day time sleep, he does occassionaly sleep through, but then we have done this and he has been up every hour for some reason.
Its hard, hard hard.

madmarchscare · 22/10/2005 13:48

Im dreading big boy bed time.

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Donbean · 22/10/2005 13:51

He was climbing out of his cot so we had no choice, it went ok, but it gives him the freedom to wander.
It sounds like your ds has got used to you bobbing in, formed into a habit so to speak.
Its a tough one to break.

madmarchscare · 22/10/2005 14:36

Definately a habit and one I could do with breaking before we do get to big boy bed stage (which will also mean rearranging bedroom). How old was your DS when he 'escaped'?

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Donbean · 22/10/2005 18:13

He was 2.
We had to rearrange the furniture which i thought would be unsettling to him in the first instance, bu no, he was ok with it.
I would have left him for as long as he was ok in a cot,

madmarchscare · 23/10/2005 17:28

Well, did an hour and a bit nap yesterday and result. 8 - 6.30 without a peep, then popped in and was OK until 7.45.

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