Sister just changed her FB to 'single' - not sure what to do...

[ASecretLemonadeDrinker]

She is abit hard to 'deal' with, very snappy/grumpy and we don't see alot of eachother really and when I see her it's always on eggshells. Shr recently told my mum she wanted nothing to do with her because my mum told her sister that my sister may be coming to visit soon, my sister flipped about mum making plans etc. whereas she only said that she was coming to Ireland soon, not exactly organising visits. She then cancelled mums mothers day present (trip to ballet) and won't talk to her. If she is watching TV and we are chatting, she will suddenly go "shhhh!" in a really aggresive tone for example, she gets pissed off very easily. Obvioulsy though she must be having a rough time, her and her b/f have been together quite a few years now and she left my mums to live in London near him (but her own place) and I guess she must be feeling she has no one now. She obviously wants people to know/care by putting it on FB, but I really don't know what to do because she blows up alot - like a terrier you try and stroke! I did message her a week ago asking if she wanted to do anything before I have DC3 (2 weeks) and she just said briefly she was nearby on Saturday and would be free for lunch (no "how are you" back etc.) and I replied I would make sure DH wasn't working and let her know, to which I have heard nothing (and he is working but am abit scared to tell her after making the suggestion in the first place). But what on earth do I do now? L:ast time she was here she came with my mum and I had been up all night and didn't have the breakfast ready and it was hell on earth with my mum being nasty and shouting, sister sulking and making snide comments and I told them to leave and apparently my sister refused to eat when she got home and sulked all day. She is 27 by the way, she does sound about 16 in all this. What would you do?

[bumpybecky]

nothing

don't go poking things that might bite!

[TotalChaos]

if you are prepared to get ranty ingratitude for your pains, then do the grown up thing and call her, check she is OK. given her difficult nature, I could understand if you didn't want to.

[seeyoukay]

Whatever you do if her last BF was a keeper don't post "shotgun" as a comment.

That won't go down well.

[ASecretLemonadeDrinker]

I was pretending I didn't see it but have commented on something else on FB so am now running the risk of her thinking I must have seen it on the homepage I just really am not in the frame of mind for the games - if I message and she doesn't reply, do I message her again? Will she then tell everyone I don't care, or then tell everyone I am pestering her? I have had to guide my mum through her not talking to her anymore - at what point does she leave it? Does my sister want my mum to email every day? Go round there? I don't want to end up in the same situation where I am having to work out what my sister wants me to do without making anything worse! I don't want to be dragged into anything attention seeky, but then my sister doesn't attention seek 'in public', so this could be quite real. Maybe I should suck it up and say something - what if she is feeling really down? DH is working Sat. night so she could come for a takeaway or something, the worst that could happen is she ends up making me feel like crap by snapping or sulking but as long as I have it all planned and aren't too long answering the door or somehting that will rile her, it should be ok....?

[IsGraceAvailable]

Can't you comment on her status change, with a short "Hope you're OK" or even "Just seen this. Ring if you want to." No need to go overboard, from what you've said, but it would be kind to acknowledge the news.

I've just done this on my cousin's status, as it happens.