I'm new to this and just want to ask for some advice...

[MissLaRue]

Hello
I'm new to mumsnet (class myself as a stepmum although we're not married) and I feel I need people to talk to who may be in a similar situation.

I have been with my partner for 16 months. He and his wife separated 1 year before we got together and my DP was living at his mums. We now live together.

When we first got together he told me he was no longer married. I found out he meant 'separated but still married' a while later. Divorce proceedings only started 8 months ago.

I've goined 2 step kids, 1 boy 6 and 1 girl 8. We have them here twice a week, more during holidays.

Thats basically my situation. I'd like some advice and people to chat too about it.

Sometimes i feel so upsset about having his kids over, they remind me of the life and love he used to have and sometimes it brings me to tears and I have to make myself scarce. Other times we have a great time.
We plan to marry and have our own family but I keep thinking it won't be the same as he's already done the whole marriage and kids thing.

Am I being stupid?? any shared thoughts and feelings are greatly apreciated.

[chippychippybangbang]

Hi MissLaRue, welcome to MN! Although I'm sure plenty of people on here will be happy to help if they can, you might get more relevant response on the step parenting section (in the being a parent bit.)

FWIW I don't think you're being stupid at all, it's natural to feel the way you do. You do need to make sure the dc's don't see you upset though and stay as cheerful and stable as you can for them, even if you don't feel that way, save it for private. However you feel, it is far more of an upheaval for them and they didn't ask to be put into this situation.

I wish you luck with it all

[MissLaRue]

Thanks I will add my post to the step parenting section,