Just found out my DH has been looking at porn on our comuter...

[HmmWhatToDo]

I am the main user of our computer. Dh occasionally uses it too. It's a laptop but lives in the lounge.

I was just going to go on youtube to look of a music video and as I typed www.you in to the title bar at the top it came up with more options of sites that have been visited before. There were quite a few, maybe 5 or so that said youjizz.com

I checked the title bar as I thought it might just be like google when it tries to guess where you want to go but it only has sites stored i've been on under every other letter.

I then checked history and it said this site has been visited a week ago, 2 weeks ago and 3 weeks ago. Also said some searched had been done on the site for things like 'stockings'. This doesn't really bother me as such as I know one of my dh's things is stockings and other things he searched for are pretty normal, nurse, big boobs etc

It's just, well, I feel a bit strange about it. We have viewed porn togehter before,early in our relationship and enjoyed it at the time but we have a little one now and no time for that or oppertunity.

The other thing is i'm pregnant and I basically go totally off sex when pregnant so am now feeling a little, well, guilty he's had to go elsewhere iyswim, like i've been neglecting him

The most hypocritical thing is that even though i've gone off sex I regularily view porn on my mobile phone when I masturbate, probably more than he does

I dunno, I know he likes porn to a certain extent, I know he's a man and he has 'needs' like we all do. I just assumed as he has no porn mags (to my knowlegde) that he wasn't bothered about it and was being gallant and saving himself all for me... I also feel a bit insecure that he find the other women more attractive than me and i'm jsut a big pregnant blob

I know i'm being silly. I just don't know whether to mention that i've noticed he's looked or keep schtum. I kinda like the idea of getting it out in the open cause then I can admit to my mobile use and won't feel so secretive.

He's a good man and we've only had sex once since I fell pg and i'm due in march . I wish I could get myself in the mood and give him a thrill or two!

[IMoveTheStarsForNoOne]

no big deal, IMO. sorry... would have felt the same way as you when I was pregnant though if that helps.

[OldLadyKnowsNothing]

Oh, this is soooo not what I thought it'd be! Tell him what you've found and have a laugh about it - that's what I did, and it was actually reassuring.

[TrinityReindeer]

no big deal at all
dont think of it again

he loves you totally
he was just having a little fun like you did

[sanfairyann]

you can get porn on your mobile phone?? gosh - what is the world coming to? [old lady disapproving face]

[HmmWhatToDo]

it does help, I wish I could get back in the mood though...

The other thing is I kinda wanted to keep the laptop 'clean' in case ds ever brings up anything untoward and i'm not sure how to clear the history... I never discussed this with dh but that's cause I assumed he didn't look at porn on it.

[HmmWhatToDo]

Thanks ladies, starting to feel better already

sanfairy, yes, just through an image search on google if you take the safe settings off

[Missus84]

Really, it's quite sweet that he's sorting himself out rather than bothering you while you're not very keen on sex

I'd mention it in a jokey way. Even if you've gone off sex, could you make time for some mutual masturbation, rathering than indulging separately?

[TBMOM]

I wouldn't pay much heed to it to be honest, it's probably just a passing phase (well until you have the baby) and you're feeling emotional and fragile because of your hormones.

Had to laugh when you said 'keep the laptop clean' as I thought you meant from 'secretions' IYSWIM!

It would be hypocritical of you to condem him for his actions when you are doing the same. You know how you feel when you do it and you know you mean no harm to your husband so try to look at it from that point of view when you think of him doing it.

You know, you don't have to have full sex to satisfy him whilst you're not in the mood. I'm sure a hand job or a blowy would go down a treat!

You could always talk to him and tell him what you've found in a non-confrontational way. He might be able to reassure you and it might bring you a bit closer.

[IMoveTheStarsForNoOne]

Yes to Russell Brand AND Johnny Depp.

[HmmWhatToDo]

Missus - I know, it is sweet He really doesn't bother me but at the same time constantly tells me how attractive he finds me and how much he likes me boobs etc

I think I could at least make the effort for the mutual masturbation... I guess I don't attempt it cause I don't want to get him all turned on and then he be disapointed when there's no sex at the end of it... Maybe if I lay some ground rules

[HmmWhatToDo]

TBMOM - I know you're right.

I never thought that when I said about keeping the laptop clean ha ha!

Imove - Are they your fantasies or did you type on wrong thread?

[HmmWhatToDo]

LeQueen - Lol at 'happy ending'

Actually, I'm a bit jelous he gets to watch proper porn videos on a full sized screen whilst I get tiny stills on my phone!

[HmmWhatToDo]

Thanks for the reassurance ladies, off to bed now...

[InMyLittleHead]

Re 'cleaning' laptop - in Internet Explorer, go to Tools, then Internet OPtions, then 'delete history', job done.

[OldLadyKnowsNothing]

Also, download CCleaner but beware, it scrubs a lot.

[Bigbadmummy]

Maybe the lads at work were talking about it and he was curious the first time and then decided to just have another look or two?

You havent told him about the history on your phone, so it is good that you are not shocked by this.

Why don't you talk to him about exactly how you found it and ask if you might look at some together at some point?

You weren't being sneaky and you appear to have a great relationship so talking would be good. Or you might find you get into the "what is he doing on the laptop" worry spriral everytime he does use it.

[HmmWhatToDo]

InMyLittleHead - Ah thanks for the laptop cleaning tip

OldLady - Will have a look at that CCleaner too although think the first option might do it..

BigBadM - That's a possibility, it seems from the history that a google search was done on it at some point so I suppose he would have had to find out the name of the site from somewhere, he does work in a very 'male' environment

I've decided for now not to tell him I know but i'm also not really bothered about it and would not be bothered if he continued to do it. My main concern is just that ds doesn't come across it although he'd have to be pretty good on the computer as he's only 2!

I did have chat with him last night but didn't mention this. I just said that even though I go off sex when pg it doesn't mena I don't find him attractive and doesn't mean we can't do 'other stuff'. I said I had heald back from doing other stuff as I felt he might be disapointed when he doesn't get the whole hog, so to speak. He was happy I mentioned this and said any kind of mutual fun is fine with him and he's not bothered at all if it doesn't lead to sex .

It's actually been a good thing me discovering this as I feel it's given me a kick up the bum! We had a bit of fun last night and will be doing tonight also I think, i'm actually looking forward to it