Leaving NPD partner on Tuesday, feeling stressed.

[BertieBotts]

It has been nearly 3 months since I first decided I definitely had to leave. This feels like the hardest part - everything is sorted and I am going on Tuesday, it feels really unreal. (P does not know I am going) I need to sort some practical things like getting myself a new mobile number and getting internet set up at the new place, but I keep putting it off. Luckily I have my mum behind me - think I will be on autopilot on the day and just do it!

But I am feeling so stressed and anxious, I can't eat or sleep. I am going to leave P a note explaining I will be cutting contact completely for 2 weeks to allow him time to get very drunk, smash things up if he wants and then calm down before I let him anywhere near DS.

Not really sure why I am posting I suppose I just need some reassurance - I know a lot of you have been here and survived!

[scodgie]

Good luck. You are being brave to make the move and have obviously thought about it.
I haven't been there but things may end up that way. Always good to know you're not the only one!

[cathcat]

Want to wish you good luck. Try not to be stressed. Keep your end goal in sight. Take care of yourself.

[BertieBotts]

Thanks scodgie and cathcat

[feelingpositivemum]

I am three months down the line having left and despite things being a bit fraught it was definitely the right thing to do and I feel stronger every day.
It's the best thing you will ever do, and keep thinking the alternative would be hell.
Good luck, you will hopefully feel better after Tuesday and I have to say there is nothing nicer than having your own front door!

[MrsFlittersnoop]

Hi Bertie,

Just wanted to wish you all the best for next Tuesday. Went through a very similar break up 10 years ago when DS was a toddler. Feeling utterly stressed is totally normal.

So glad to hear you have your mum to help you!
I realised after I left ex-DP and moved back in with my mum for a while (20 years after leaving home ) - THIS is what it's like to live with someone who loves you unconditionally. I had forgotten.

Even though she drove me bonkers sometimes, I knew her worrying and nagging sprang from love and concern for her baby girl (aged 38!!) and grandson.

You can walk into any phone shop on the High St and get a phone + internet dongle when you feel ready. Just concentrate on looking after yourself and your DS for the next few days.

You will be fine - I've read your threads about your relationship and you know you are doing the right thing.

And BTW - many thanks for your kind words about my DS on my thread! .

[NicknameTaken]

Good luck, Bertie! Great that you'll have your mum with you. And being on autopilot is fine, if it gets you through!

Like MrsFlittersnoop, it was such a revelation after I left ex to spend time with friends and family who actually seemed to like me and who didn't ride roughshod over me.

The first few days are hard, but it gets better quicker than you think. You can do this, babe! You won't know yourself afterwards.

[Lemonylemon]

Keep going - YOU CAN DO THIS. Courage. It is very stressful, I know. It's the thought of what's ahead. The actual doing won't be quite so stressful. You know why you're doing it and you haven't made the decision rashly, so you know you're right.

Very good luck - I look forward to hearing your updates.....

And the relief, well, I can't tell you!