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Online Dating: How the flip does one "market oneself" when not photogenic?

(10 Posts)
BillericayDuckie Wed 16-Nov-16 20:42:18

Just that really.

Although the thought terrifies me, I know I'm going to have to give OLD a go to increase my chances of meeting someone.
BUT, I am so not photogenic. Photos of me are truly awful!

I'm sure I don't look this bad in RL (trying not to think of the phrase "the camera never lies!). My ExDP told me as we were breaking up that I am "an attractive girl" and I've never had a problem attracting men previously (just always seem to pick the wrong ones, but that's a different story!). But this has always been in RL, where perhaps my other qualities are more apparent?

As the whole OLD process relies on people finding your photograph attractive, I wondered if any of you lovely people can offer advice to help me find "my best side"!

HotCheesePiece Wed 16-Nov-16 20:47:03

What phone do you have? Some camera apps have filters on them (some subtle, some not so subtle) that can make your skin look smoother, eyes a little brighter... Even slim your face a bit.

Some people go too far and look completely different when they use these but used sparingly they can help make a photograph a bit more flattering.

niceupthedance Wed 16-Nov-16 20:49:36

Make your photo interesting; that is be doing something that people can ask about? Or an arty kind of shot? Something intriguing. Make your profile witty and inviting. Not everyone picks by photo alone.

museumum Wed 16-Nov-16 20:51:44

Can you use a further away shot of doing something exciting? Top of a mountain? Travelling to somewhere beautiful?
Or the other way a really arty shot in shadow?
Depends if you're action woman or an arty type. I'd go for some kind of cycling or skiing shot if I had to OLD.

BillericayDuckie Wed 16-Nov-16 21:05:28

Hmmmm... ok. Probably more on the arty side than action. But not sure I have any recent photos that would fall into this category - too busy bringing up children for that kind of thing! Plus I always seem to be the one behind the camera taking the photos. I did use to play in a band and have some photos from then, but that was before I had my Dd1. Still have my guitar though and am considering getting back into it....

I have an iPhone. Am not very tech savvy - can just about make a photo black and white! I thought that people would prefer clear natural smiley shots as opposed to more abstract (filtered!) ones?

Cineraria Wed 16-Nov-16 21:23:52

Could you do an odd angle or focus more on a very appealing feature. I always make weird faces when having my photo taken, probably because I'm nervous, but I have nice hip length hair so I put my phone on my knees and took a photo through the pile of hair on my lap, up the lengths of it and my face slightly to the side and seeming to be more in the distance. My face seemed to be doing a haughty expression on that occasion but I didn't think it mattered too much at that distance.

My hair got 20 dates in a month and two later meetings with men who lived overseas (i was listed as open to romantic, friendly or penpal type relationships) although I also got some very weird emails from men with very odd plans for it! I also got a few emails asking bluntly if the odd angle was because I was fat, which was a handy filter as I didn't want a man that rude really.

DH was number 20 and he still teases me about meeting up with 21 and 22 and about the fact that the first thing he saw of me was my nostrils because of the angle!

stubbornstains Wed 16-Nov-16 21:41:12

Have you played around with taking selfies?

I, too, am fearsomely unphotogenic- but have had two previous bouts of OLD, both of which were fairly successful, (on the second, the first date I had was with XP, and we had a baby together- OK, he turned out to be a twat,but that wasn't really the fault of OLD).

Yesterday I did some playing around with selfies, and tried that "holding the phone slightly above you and taking the photo in half profile" trick, and I actually got one that looks pretty nice! Plus, there's a plastic T Rex in the shot, and what man could resist a plastic T Rex? grin

BillericayDuckie Wed 16-Nov-16 21:54:45

Like the fact your hair got you lots of dates Cineraria AND helped you filter out the weirdos!

I've been taking loads of selfies lately. Problem is mainly my largish nose. Whatever angle I use, it just takes over! Also I've lost some weight since I split with my ExDP (nothing like a bit of heartache to shift the pounds), but whilst my body looks great, I'm at an age where my face looks a bit tired and scraggy. Probably should try a few full body shots next!

SeasonalVag Thu 17-Nov-16 05:01:28

I met my husband because I was intrigued at pic of guy wrapped up in scarf hat and sunnies .... in the flesh he was a doll! I still don't understand why he didn't showcase his face as it's a lovely one! You could do the same....

Musiclife Thu 17-Nov-16 05:43:10

Take about 50 or even more and you usually get one that is passable.

Mine are of me in the mirror. I cropped them so they were head and shoulder.

I am wearing a red dress in one photo which apparently attracts the greatest attention which I didn't know at the time.

I am really unphotogenic also with a large nose but managed it. I have also found a flattering pose which works whenever I have a photo taken on a night out or family party. Took me a long time but it helps.

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