I'm not even sure that the subject makes sense!
I've been seeing a counsellor for six weeks or so following a shitty year - coming to terms with marriage failure, redundancy, DD2 self harming - to name just a few of my least favourite things!
Anyways, talking to her today I realised that my relationships have followed a bizarre pattern since I first started dating - almost 40 years ago
It seems that at the start of all my significant relationships I had a choice: kind, generous, thoughtful men/boys or the one I chose. None of the choices were 'bad' or abusive but for one reason or another forced me to fight for their attention, were niggardly with their love and time and basically unreliable. Great when I had their attention, but otherwise lackadaisical.
So, given that's 4 pairs of men in several decades, is that simply coincidence?
If not, how do I break the pattern? I'm faced with a similar choice at the moment but how do I choose a man I like but find dull in large doses and not fanciable over one who I find exciting and irrestible, without turning him into some sort of emotional experiment?
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Relationships
when you realise it's not coincidence but a pattern how do you change?
12 replies
Secretservice · 12/09/2016 16:09
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