Separated for 7 months now, from long term marriage. Two teenagers who live with me. I know 7 months isn't a long time, but in my head at the time, I gave myself 6 months to be sad, miserable, get on with life, find new friends, hobbies all that sort of thing.
Well of course, 6 months had gone by now, and its quite the opposite in fact. I am really miserable, haven't done anything that I wanted to do, haven't made any new friends, and lost majority of those I did have (I did do a post on this, as lost friends now as I no longer fit into the married couples clique), just don't have the energy to go and find a hobby and I am lonely.
I only got to see dd for half of her birthday, I sobbed all that night as felt awful that I wasn't out for a meal with her like would usually happen (we did have breakfast, but we would normally let the dc choose a place where they wanted to eat on their birthday). Then there is the mindfuck that I am in at the moment as I had propositions from married men to have affairs (I posted about that too..), so now I have it in my head that I maybe I have always been a tease (as he so politely put it) and that is the impression that I am giving out to people. I am, or should I say, was, quite outgoing, would be the one at the party to be the first to dance, the entertaining one I suppose. So now, I don't even want to go anywhere as if I do, and actually act like I normally would, its going to give out the impression that I am 'asking for one'. So, its simply easier to sit at home.
Just an example, I was supposed to meet friends (a couple) on Saturday, who I haven't seen this year at all. I was going somewhere first and was going to meet up with them once I was done. About 15 minutes before the time we agreed to meet, I got a message to say they couldn't make it anymore. But later that night, the wife checked in on facebook at a pub not far from where we were due to meet. That would hurt anyone, wouldn't it?
So, if you are happy, being by yourself, doing what you want to do, going out with friends.... did you feel like I do now, at any point? Is this a phase, because I am not happy at all. Really, in all honesty, would rather be back in an unhappy marriage, with a husband who I don't trust for a minute, than live like this.
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A question for divorced/seperated singles who are happy
16 replies
isthismylifenow · 11/07/2016 12:14
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