Hi ladies (and maybe some gentlemen)
This is a long thread, so apologies in advance, but I am wanting some advice from other parents who don't actually know me personally.
I was engaged to the most perfect man for 4 1/2 years. I have two children from a previous marriage, and one child with this man. Our relationship was great; we were best friends as well as partners. We encountered a lot of pressure over the last few months; money worries, house worries... I do admit I did neglect my fiance's needs, both intimately and in general. We did begin arguing quite a bit, but always moved on.
Six weeks ago, he was offered a new job. I was very proud of him and encouraged him to go for it. It meant he had to attend a two week training course over 3 hours away, but he would be back for weekends.
He went off on his first week, and I noticed he didn't really contact me much. He Facetimed the children a few times, but didn't seem to want contact with me. We argued the whole of that week, as I was trying to hold down the fort, work full time all the while missing him so much. He came back at the weekend, and we sorted it out. We were very, very close, and told each other how much we loved each other and that we needed to make much more of an effort.
However, the second week was exactly the same. He'd promise to call me and 8, and then call at 9.30.
He came home again that weekend, walked through the door and told me he didn't love me anymore and didn't want to be with me. He said it was because the relationship had been hard for the past couple of months, and he couldn't be with me anymore. He moved out that day (my daughter's birthday) and moved 12 miles away to his mums.
Last Saturday, I asked him to come and see his son., in which he answered he didn't have any money. However, photos on Facebook appeared of him with a group of girls up where he had done his training; one of the girls was next to him in every photo and in one she had her hand on his leg. I felt devastated. When I challenged him, he insisted that nothing was going on and that they were just friends.
He has seen his son a handful of times. He came over a few evenings last week to see the children from 4pm- 9pm, and we actually got on really well. It was clear there was still love between us, and a strong connection.
However, yesterday he picked our son up and he had him for the day, which of course I was more than happy for. My friend then asked me if I wanted to go out for a few drinks in the evening, so I text my ex fiance asking if he had plans. He said no, so I said to him that he could look after our son for longer. he went off on one and started being quite abusive, then telling me he did have plans. When he brought our son back, he became very abusive in front of our son. He called me all sorts of names and told me I shouldn't be going out. He got right up in my face, so I pushed him away. He ultimately left, cursing at me.
His sister then start sending me messages threatening me, telling me if I stop my ex seeing our son then I will have all them to deal with. She also confirmed to me that my ex was always Facetiming and talking to this girl from where he did his training.
My parents looked after my son, so I still went out.
I have no idea what to do. I am heartbroken, angry, upset... I don't think he has enough money to take me to court. But I don't know what to believe, what to do...
Please help!
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In desperate need of help...
12 replies
Cemma28 · 22/05/2016 21:14
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