i did it.

[TheEntWife]

i told him i wanted a divorce.

He is so angry right now. Accusing me of ruining everything, of destroying him. I feel so guilty for hurting him this way but i just couldn't live like this any longer.

Our marriage has been empty for a long time. 3 kids and bucket loads of resentment. He always has to be right and in control. I was always in the wrong. i used to be able to brush that off but i cant any more.

Once i allowed myself to admit it, i felt so suffocated and controlled in our relationship and realized i was acting out in foolish ways to defy his authority but was really only making the conflict deeper.

We were setting an appalling example of marriage for our daughters.

Today I feel like i can breathe again. I just wish i could make it better for him. I dont want to deliberately hurt him but i cant let live like that any more.

He says i am not even trying to fix it but i feel like we have been trying for years and i have no faith that we can fix it. All we were doing was prolonging the agony.

[lalalonglegs]

Good luck, TheEntWife. I hope it all goes well from here - you are over one very high psychological hurdle, focus on the practical as much you can.

[Costacoffeeplease]

Keep the feeling of being able to breathe, and ignore his tantrum - he's still trying to control you

[Twitterqueen]

Many of us have been where you are right now OP. Onwards and upwards! Best wishes as you move towards your new life - as one who knows, it will be worth it!

[Lightheartedindeed]

I honestly could have written your post myself. Every bit of it. No advice but wish you luck

[HandyWoman]

Good luck, Entwife, you've done a strong and brilliant thing, both for your dc, and you. You will be fine, sad but fine. Enjoy the space....

[ALaughAMinute]

Keep going and stay strong. There is light at the end of the tunnel.