I need some help to make a big decision, this is the full story, im not looking for sympathy, just honest opinions.
I was with my ex for 3 1/2 years, 5 weeks ago i left her and moved back in with my mum because i became ill and needed to get help.
This is gonna be long but i dont wanna drip feed, im 24 and my partners 34 with 5 children ageing from 15-7, she has ptsd and i have servere anxiety and depression.
we met when we both lived in homeless accommodation, she was ecasping her violent exH who tried to kill her and my mum had lost her job at a place that we had live in accommodation. Our relationship happened quite fast and 2 month later we were living together, evrything was perfect untill about 6 month in, she started telling me she hated my friends and they were bad influences, so i stopped talking to most of them and ended up only seeing 1 or 2 close friends. As time went on the controlling behaviour got worse to the point i wasnt allowed to watch tv if there were girls in the programme, i wasnt allowed to listen to music if they were female singers, i wasnt allowed on any social networking sites because she thought i was talking to girls, in the end i got rid of my phone just to keep the peace. We moved house about a year after we got together, things were good for about 4 month and then she started again, i couldnt walk down the street without being accused of looking at girls, i couldnt talk to anybody i knew because she would get jealous, i was emotionally drained by this point and i stoped going out just to stop the arguments.
September this year she decided she was going to college and i supported her as she is actually brilliant at what she wanted to do and i thought it would give her something else to focus on, by this point i was playing mum to the DC, i was getting them up, dressed and to school, picking them up, doing tea and homework, doing baths and bedtime, she actually didnt really have a roll in there lives, she would just let them do whatever they wanted.
She has been violent on a few occasions and ive never once hit her back, shes always applogised and seemed very sorry so ive forgave her. The past 5 weeks i havent been there shes been going to therapy and has told me shes going to change but im not convinced. She wants me to go back but i really dont wanna go back to that life.
Is it possible for her to change or should i keep well away?
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Help me make a decision. Full story
15 replies
NCforthisshit · 12/02/2016 11:10
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