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Long distance relationship help!!

(2 Posts)
brittmoo Thu 07-Jan-16 22:31:23

Trying to make a LONG story short here..29 years old living in WA with a 10 year old daughter. Her dad has always been out of the picture. I have been in a slew of unsuccessful relationships her whole life. I always thought I would find "the one" and be a happy house wife and give my daughter some stability for once...I even got married, but the man turned out to be a sociopath and I divorced him 2 years later.
So I moved in with my sister after the divorce and met "the one" an amazingly sweet,caring guy...but he lives in TN. We had an LDR for 2 years and made plans for me to move out there. He has visited me and my daughter in WA 2x and I have gone to TN 2x. When time to move came closer, I got cold feet. If it was just my life to worry about, I'd be out there in a heartbeat...but is it fair to move my daughter to a place she has NO family? I am a server and don't make enough to afford regular visits back and forth...plus worst case scenario the relationship turns shitty like all my past relationships, what would I do?
He has a sick father and is not willing to move to WA...so I broke up with him. I think I just needed some space to clear my head. It has now been nine months since the break up, I thought I would be over him by now but I still love him so much. I'm terrified that I made a horrible decision and that he was the love of my life. I have gone on other dates..but no guy compares to him. We have texted just briefly about once a month...he is acting very distant because I broke his heart.
I want him back! but my family thinks I am only feeling this way because I moved out of my sister's house into my dad's and don't get along AT ALL with my step mom. Im trying to finish school and pay of debt. Life has basically turned to shit since I broke up with him. I miss having his companionship, he was my best friend.
Im so torn between love and being a "good" mom to my kid. I want to do whats best for her so I think I should stay...but then the next moment I cry over him and feel like this breakup has made me appreciate him more, I dont want to live without him.
What would you do??

Bluemg Sat 13-Feb-16 09:38:02

I think you should fight for your relationship. Happy mom happy kid. Patience is needed to introduce your kid to him. And I think, when a single man wanting to have a serious relationship with you knowing that you have had a child is a huge commitment.

Please consider these things.
At the same time, you can start to open your daughter's mind about having him in your life. Tell her that her dad won't ever be replaced but your bf is more caring and loving to both of you. And this is healthy.

Good luck!

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