Let's call her Sally. We have a mutual friend Ann.
Ann has recently left a 10 year relationship after being unfaithful. She's not proud of that but there were a million reasons she should have left earlier. Ex was controlling e.g. refused to "let" her work because he earned more than enough to make any "little" job she might be able to get pointless.
Anyway once he learned she was unfaithful, he turned violent. There were at least 5 separate occasions when Ann was black and blue.
Sally is (was) Ann's oldest friend, they were at school together and have supported each other through one previous divorce each. Were in touch daily and Sally was the only person Ann confided in initially over the beatings, showing her the bruises.
Sally had also previously been told by an acquaintance, that Ann needed to be careful with ex, as he had beaten a previous girlfriend badly, although he hadn't been violent towards Ann at that point, so they both dismissed it at the time.
Sally has cut all contact with Ann since she left, feeling that she treated ex appallingly by being unfaithful. Ann agrees that she shouldn't have cheated but doesn't understand why Sally is still good friends with ex, knowing what she knows. She'd understand if Sally didn't want to be friends with her, but she doesn't get why she does want to be friends with ex. Sally and her DH were on holiday with ex and his new GF last week. Sally apparently thinks Ann got what she deserved and ex was only giving a natural response to being cheated on.
She has been good friends with Ann for 30 years and only knew ex through Ann. Why do some women take this kind of view?
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Can't understand this friend's behaviour
21 replies
AdventureBe · 17/06/2015 09:53
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