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'friend' problems

(38 Posts)
starodyssey2015 Tue 26-May-15 13:52:34

I've been friends with this girl for years. And in the past few years we've strayed apart, she makes no effort and I've kind of accepted the friendship is over. I'd of liked to have kept her on Facebook if she ever fancies rekindling the relationship.

However, I feel bullied by her friends. Everytime I like or comment on something on her Facebook someone makes a nasty comment at me, someone even called me desperate the other day because I asked if she was in our area. I honestly have no idea what I've done to deserve this. In fact just now she was 'fraped' and they commented on my Facebook status calling me names. She deleted it and I said whoever did that is a nob and she called me rude. Like for gods sake I think it's justified when I've never ever done anything to them. Some of them I haven't even met! Her boyfriend was my childhood best friend and even he's started doing it!

Im a grown woman with a husband and a child and I am being bullied! I'm getting really annoyed and upset by this and it's just got to the point where I want them all out of my life for good but I don't want to cause a feud incase I see her about.

Should I say something to her?

MadAsgardian Tue 26-May-15 13:54:30

I think you should just disengage. She doesn't sound like much of a friend.

tasha24x Tue 26-May-15 13:55:19

Block & Delete Her. Out of sight, out of mind. Dont give her the satisfaction of rising to it. Xx

S0mmer Tue 26-May-15 13:56:00

Wow. I would just leave it there. Even if for whatever reason she is content with your friendship having been relegated, she must be embarrassed of her friends' behaviour. And if she's not, she should be. I wouldn't say anything. I would hide her posts. Don't like or comment on her posts. That way, unless she extends an olive branch or a comment, you won't think of her. The next move, if there is one, should be hers.

starodyssey2015 Tue 26-May-15 14:05:09

Leah, I'm going to delete you off facebook. Not because I don't like you or anything but I feel I can't have a conversation with you without your friends making a comment. Not entirely sure what I've done to them but either way it's frustrating when all I do is try to see you and I just get abuse. I've pretty much grown out of it now and I think it's childish. I have work friends on Facebook and I don't really want them seeing all this crap. It's starting to annoy me and I'm just trying to cut the negativity out. If you ever want to talk about anything or see me and Max here's my number -

I've written this. Should I even bother sending it?

AlternativeTentacles Tue 26-May-15 14:11:33

Just block her and delete. Who cares if she sees you out and about?

SoleSource Tue 26-May-15 14:12:01

Yeah, send it. Then hide her posts. What were her friends saying about you.

starodyssey2015 Tue 26-May-15 14:25:27

Well I put up that I was sick on facebook and what can I use to stop me feeling sick. And then one of my friends joked around saying 'you're not pregnant again are you' and we were joking about it

Then one of her friends posted on the status saying I looked it. Which is really upsetting because I'm still in the process of losing my baby weight and I'm a size 12. But it really hurt my feelings

AndTheBandPlayedOn Tue 26-May-15 14:26:38

No, silence is more dignified after she has already ended it (from your OP). As you have experienced, any contact will only result in negative responses (why offer them more entertainment at your expense?). Sorry, but you have had enough clues here to just walk away. You don't need to have the last word.

Did you mean to use a real life name in your post? You might want to get MNHQ to edit it for you (by reporting your own post?).

FlabulousChix Tue 26-May-15 14:28:31

Is send it. Then delete and block not nice at all

AndTheBandPlayedOn Tue 26-May-15 14:29:13

X-post, star. See? You need to block them, or even better, perhaps step away from fb entirely.

Smooshface Tue 26-May-15 14:29:35

Her friends sound like jerks, and children. I would make your posts friends only and unfriend any if them. Just stay friends with your friend if you want to, unfollow here if you want to stop notifications.

starodyssey2015 Tue 26-May-15 14:31:52

Yeah I didn't think about that when I pasted it. It's her real name but she doesn't spell it like that (no clue why don't ask me). She wouldn't go on this and my real names not on here.

starodyssey2015 Tue 26-May-15 14:33:36

Thanks for your advice everybody x

logicalfallacy101 Tue 26-May-15 14:59:07

Star.... don't send it. Silence says it all. Maybe my advice is wrong, and the silence might just be beyond her underatanding. You know her best. Trust your gut.

Hissy Tue 26-May-15 14:59:25

why don't you set your audience to Friends Only - and block all of the offending 'friends'?

logicalfallacy101 Tue 26-May-15 15:00:28

Understanding duh!!

Fudgeface123 Tue 26-May-15 15:07:12

You've accepted the friendship is over so why are you still liking her stuff on Facebook, she's obviously not interested. I'm sorry but your message comes across as a bit desperate, she's already zoned you out and will probably laugh with her friends about your message.

VanitasVanitatum Tue 26-May-15 15:55:26

Oh god no don't send that and please don't give her your number!! She is not a nice person and she may let her friends continue to bully you if they have your number. Just block and delete, you do not need that negativity in your life.

starodyssey2015 Tue 26-May-15 16:00:34

I don't 'like' her things on facebook?

cuntycowfacemonkey Tue 26-May-15 16:00:50

For goodness sakes delete her from facebook and then sort out your privacy settings so the others can't see your posts or comment

BeeHappyAndSmile Tue 26-May-15 16:01:24

I'd keep her as your FB 'friend' but block her friends that sound totally pathetic.

starodyssey2015 Tue 26-May-15 16:01:28

And it would be on private message. I wouldn't put it on her fb for her mean friends to see!

starodyssey2015 Tue 26-May-15 16:06:22

I deleted her friends, it's if I ever go on her Facebook (which I avoid nowadays). My Facebook is private but for some weird reason they go onto hers and put nasty things. She doesn't apologise though. Think it would be best just to call it a day.

tomanyanimals Tue 26-May-15 16:06:28

Don't send it she is ok with them being nasty and hasn't been exactly polite herself why come over as though treating you like that is ok but her friends can't just delete them and forgot if she really wanted to get in contact with you she would find a way that's what true friends do

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