ishouldbedoingtheironing

[ishouldbedoingtheironing]

I have a problem. Group of friends for a number of years, all have kids. Now some of the kids are starting high school and problems arising. One of my close friends refused to accept her son is a bully. Is bullying son of friend in group.
Has been confronted by me and, true to form my friend, is in complete denial and saying her son is the victim.
Please help my friendship is at stake.
How do I get my friend to accept responsibility for son's actions?
Close group of friends and all are affected. If we exclude this friend from the group severe repercussions. Help!!!!!!

[ishouldbedoingtheironing]

bump

[cod]

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[ishouldbedoingtheironing]

We are a group of close friends since kids at toddlers. Come through a lot. Lost friend to cancer. Thought all really close. Boys involved at different schools so can't go there. Happening outwith school hours.
I think that part of problem is that one mum is bullying other mum, is much stronger personality therefore feels she does not have to take into account her feelings.

[cod]

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[cod]

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[ishouldbedoingtheironing]

But scary to do that.

[cod]

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[Perigrine]

Have to agree with Cod, make ezcesues and let friendship go!

[ishouldbedoingtheironing]

Sorry, I don't understand what you're talking about.

[ishouldbedoingtheironing]

Last message was to Cod.

[Perigrine]

Have your excuses ready by the phone

Dentist
visiting mum
school pickup
hairdresser

[Perigrine]

BE VAGUE FOR LONG ENOUGH - and she'll get the message!

[ishouldbedoingtheironing]

Problem is that sons don't actually play together. No real contact. Bullying son is actually targetting other son. Coming into garden and being abusive. Bullying son's mother, who is close friend, is in complete denial about this. She is at work when this happens.

[maggiesmama]

do you want to let the frienship go?

[ishouldbedoingtheironing]

That is the question. Actually as group have real good time. I am worried about being ostracised. Like the group dynamics. Other mums are not bullied just me.

[maggiesmama]

so your friend is bullying you in an attck is the best defense kinda way?

[ishouldbedoingtheironing]

I have really not had a real friendship for years with this person. But am scared of ripple effect on friends in group. They say i have their support but scared of nights out and what will happen when we are both invited to same events.

[ishouldbedoingtheironing]

PLEASE HELP!!!!!!!

[runkid]

Why some of the others say something

[maggiesmama]

sorry, got distracted

so essentially - you have a gang of friends, but one of them has been rotten to you for a while. now her son has been bullying the son of a diff group member, but she wont take responsibility for it.

assuming that summary is correct

1. what does the mother of the bullied son say?
2. what made you decide to confront her?
3. how do the others respond to her bullying you?
4. what have the others said about her son's behaviour?

[ishouldbedoingtheironing]

maggiesmama
Thanks for posting
I think that the main problem is that the mum who is being bullied has beeen bullied for several years and has only now brought it to our attention

[ishouldbedoingtheironing]

I am sooooo sorry for my drunk friends please say that you will not kick me off mns net

[runkid]

So is this a joke or what

[ishouldbedoingtheironing]

No joke just a very mixed up mum - not me.

I know what she should do ie bring "friendship " to an end but friend unwilling/unable to do so
Contacted msn so that I could show friend responses - sorry if anyone ofended by post.

[wartywarthog]

i don't really understand this thread...

shouldn't the bully victim's mum be dealing with this? are you involved because you're in the group? in which case what is everyone else doing? why isn't the victim's mum around when the bully comes into their garden?

it doesn't make sense...