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Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Relationships

Why is my ex such a bastard?

5 replies

CardiffUniversityNetballTeam · 19/10/2014 22:22

Just that really.

Why won't he just move out so we can both get on with out lives?

Surely he wants to move on as much as I do?

Why does he seem to thrive on making me upset?

Wankbadger.

Rant over.

OP posts:
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GarlicOctopus · 19/10/2014 22:41
  1. Because he's a wankbadger.
  2. Because your getting upset makes him feel important.
  3. Nah, he'll have to find a promising new victim and start all over again with the Mr Nice act. Much easier to keep pulling your strings for his ego fix.


Advice:
  1. Bore him to death! Be as blank & bland as brown paper.
  2. Stonewall.
  3. Get stronger backup.
  4. Depending on how bad things are, try a refuge?


Reminders:
  1. Dating A Loser, Joseph M Carver
  2. The Teddy Illusion, Patricia Evans
  3. Why Does He Do That?, Lundy Bancroft
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CardiffUniversityNetballTeam · 20/10/2014 11:41

Thank you garlic.

Feeling much stronger this morning. Resolved to get this idiot out of my life even if it means playing the long game.
Spoke to my solicitor as well and she has reassured me I'm in a strong position and not to let the bastard get me down!

OP posts:
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GarlicOctopus · 20/10/2014 12:26

Oh, well done, Cardiff :) Have you absolutely got to carry on living together? If he's pulling your strings, you might be able to get him removed ... I'm not sure exactly how it works, but there are a few threads going at the moment where posters are getting strong legal advice.

Being terribly dull & bland did work with my ex. (He 'won' in the end, but I didn't have Mumsnet back then!) It was peculiar, he showed me a bit more respect after I stopped rising to his bait. Weirdo.

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CardiffUniversityNetballTeam · 20/10/2014 21:02

I am working on getting him off my property ASAP. However, he is labouring under the belief that I owe him money for all his contributions while we've lived together. I have offered him money to leave but he thinks he "is entitled to more."
My solicitor says he's delusional. But until I can get rid of him he is taking great pleasure in making my life a misery.

OP posts:
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Yambabe · 20/10/2014 23:00

Is it actually your property as in the deeds, mortgage or tenancy agreement are solely in your name? If so and you are not married change the locks and buy some binbags. If you are married I think you can still give him notice to leave pending agreement of a financial settlement? Speak to your solicitor.

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