Such a long story..bit short version; married 20 years 2 DC. And having suffered much stress; debt, supporting career change, loss of mum, holding down several p/t jobs (me). DH has a breakdown, and we (I) spend a year supporting, counselling etc. He left anyway and into the arms of an old flame within weeks. To say kids and I were deverstste would be an understatement. Anyway things didn't work out with ow mainly because the hadn't be very truthful about circumstances of split...my wife doesn't understand me....blah blah. 2 years on, much pain and bitterness. He has sunk lower and lower; drinking ,depression and suicide attempts. Everything always my fault. But last 6 months he has begun to see issues are rooted in his childhood. And wants a reconciliation. But still not wholly accepting responsibility and while I juggle childcare and jobs just be moans his lot. Hate to admit I/we still love him and he is still a constant in our lives, mainly as I thought deep down he realised what he lost and kids & I missed him. Told him today unless he really took responsibility for effect of drinking and we went to counselling I couldn't see any future due to battle fatigue. MH or not what's in it for me. Am I selfish, stupid or codependent?
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