Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide, which can point you to expert advice and support.

Trying to understand / work out how soon a new relationship should move on

(31 Posts)
Scarey123 Thu 20-Mar-14 10:04:15

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Millyblods Thu 27-Mar-14 09:11:15

Him not wanting you to come to his house is odd and he definitely doesn't want you to come there as he doesn't want the possibility that you might try to spend the night.
You are not in a relationship by the sounds of it. He definitely has something else going on. He made plans with the friend then called you up at the last minute to join them. shock You are doing way too much running after him here. You are making yourself too available for someone you don't know. Plans in the future dont mean anything. It's the here and now that tells you what is going on. Get back to your own life and stop making him a priority. Is he possibly still married and he and his wife are seperated but still working on it.

Scarey123 Thu 27-Mar-14 17:20:21

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Millyblods Thu 27-Mar-14 19:19:30

I agree Scarey you need to pull back and let him persue you more. If he is really wanting to be with you, you will know about it and wont have to "ponder and dissect" every little thing. Don't be too available and don't always agree to his last minute dates.

Scarey123 Fri 28-Mar-14 10:03:16

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

That's a nice update.
Glad you had a lovely evening.
Just try not to over think things and don't move anything along too fast.
Go at your pace.
I hope it all works out for you.

Millyblods Fri 28-Mar-14 11:49:21

Well Im glad you had a nice evening too but...

11pm is not late at all
He says he was too rough for you to come to his house as he doesn't want you to see him at his worse. Yet he was perfectly well enough to go on a date. He hasn't phoned you all week. You contacted him to prompt him and he said he would bring biker gear to you. At the last minute (so to speak) you met him for dinner. And him being able to text you a lot at night does not mean there is no one else. Most men having affairs do that.
Sorry, I know that Im being a damp squid here but his lack of date arranging in advance and seeing you at last minute more than once is odd.
He really didn't want you to come to his yesterday even though he gave an excuse.
And making a little image that says I love you when it hasn't even been mentioned in person and you have not been seeing each other long is odd . Would have thought that is something you would tell each other in person. Its too easy to do these things through text. Maybe as you met him online he is actually dating lots of other women too.
Im sorry I think its all a bit odd really. Also he has said he loves you but will probably now blow cold for awhile as you have said he has form for.
No, I still think that as he is only recently out of his relationship that he is not completely out of it yet or he is still fully in his relationship and you actually meet up at a friends house not his. Just something not right.

Join the discussion

Join the discussion

Registering is free, easy, and means you can join in the discussion, get discounts, win prizes and lots more.

Register now