social services coming tomorrow because of ex p, DS father.

[Annoyedparent]

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social worker comin tomorrow

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Sun 08-Dec-13 18:05:49 Annoyedparent

DS father assaulted him recently, thankfully no injuries or marks were left. It shook DS aged 6,who has ASD up and left him with nightmares as he also badly verbally abused him. We had rekindled our relationship and he ha a key although doesn't live here. He refused to give the key back. After ring in Womans Aid for advice I rang police and local council to Change locks.

Incident was passe to Child Abuse team but because no marks left couldn't prosecute. They passed onto social care. Social worker is visiting tomorrow. she said she needs to check DS bedroom etc..

So worried. What should I expect? Ex has never gone for DS before although he has been vile to me in past. Totally shocked by it all, racked with guilt and utterly depressed.

Ex tried getting in with key couple of days ago, snapped key trying to get in as locks changed. he was then knocking windows and doors to talk. All of this in front of DS who is terrified of him. He later ran landline begging to come found next night and wanted to talk and brings few drinks for us. Told him no. He then sent two messages saying he was coming. Made sure I was back late that night. Thankfully blocked him on Facebook, his mobile is broken an he can now only ring from hostel he lives in. Fed up and low. Really worried about SS visit. Should be tidying ad cleaning in prep for it but don't have the energy Anyone much experience of SS visits?

I've never hurt DS, I treat him well although I do struggle with his behaviour. He has a statement and attends school regularly .He has a CAF. DS attends an after school games club once a week and beavers too. I take him to a special needs centre twice a week in school holidays. I try my best .I do find it difficult .he can be really hard work but I love him dearly. He is well fed has plenty of toys,books etc.. . Is well fed. I'm very scared though never had social care involvement before despite begging for it last year when we were nearly homeless .

[Bakerof3pudsxx]

I have no experience myself but you sound like you have done the right thing and like a loving caring parent which I'm sure ss will see

[Matildathecat]

Hope this will bring you more help and support. Have a general tidy, make sure his room is ok (obviously!), have some food in the fridge, maybe a list of meals planned for the week.

SW will be concerned about your exes behaviour but should be able to help with police etc. what a nightmare.

Really hope it goes well. Are you getting DLA and carers allowance? Sounds lie you're doing loads with ds, maybe you could do with some respite, though?x

[CogitoErgoSometimes]

I think the main thing they will want to establish is that there is no more 'rekindling' with the ex and that DS is not at risk. If you've changed the locks etc. that sounds like you've done the right thing. I would also expect that they will want to know how you're coping more generally. So if the place is reasonably clean & tidy, that will reassure them. If you need extra help, the visit would be a good opportunity to ask.