Ive been with my partner for 6 years and im at the end of my tether, feel like im going to explode. Hes useless. I feel so resentful towards him at the moment.
He doesnt sort out anything or take any responsibility for anything - I do all the childcare and the majority of the housework. DS is 9 weeks and was unplanned, DP was adamant i got a termination but i couldnt do it and every argument we have about me being tired or stressed comes down to the fact that 'you knew it would be hard' and it makes me weep! He is a good dad to our 21 month old DD but it honestly doesnt come naturally to him at all, his DF is a terrible role model (alcoholic abusive man). He will spend time with DS but as soon as he cries he gets angry and stressed and cant deal with him. He openly admits he hates babies and didnt start interacting with DD really until she was about 9 months and wasnt a baby anymore.
I sort all the finances, all the household problems and pretty much everything, all he does is pay the bills. I was on maternity leave but ive had to go back to work 2 days a week because all he does is critisise me for not earning and i thought that if i went back he would shut up but he hasnt. Im so stressed out. I do all the night shifts with the kids, he hasnt offered and im so worn down by it all that i dont ask. My job is quite stressful so i need a good nights sleep but DS is poorly and thats impossible.
He is expecting me to drive him to his parents this weekend (100 miles) for them to meet DS (why the fuck they havent been bothered to come and see him themselves is beyond me) and im considering putting my foot down and saying im not going. Im so tired i physically ache. DP doesnt drive, this is a HUGE issue to me and causes a lot of rows as it means i have to do all the driving and taking kids everywhere is a nightmare with 2 so young.
We were supposed to go at xmas but i was 37 weeks pregnant and not feeling confident, i put my foot down (with the help of lovely munsnetters) and we didnt go but it caused a huge argument and a pretty rubbish xmas.
I want to leave him but ive got no money and nowhere to go except my parents and i dont want to disappoint them. They know how useless he is and are very supportive and helpful but say that i knew that before i had DS (not exactly thrilled about me having another baby either) and i should just get on with it. Im worried about how it will affect the kids too.
Im sorry i waffled on, im just totally stuck, confused and fucked off! I think i just needed to rant but any advice on how i can make changes is appreciated.
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Bloody useless partner. Fed up of doing it all by myself.
18 replies
Numbthumbs · 29/03/2013 07:42
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