Mumsnet Talk

Hehe I am taking notes! :-D

i usually start groping him, or just acting flirty, or show him my bum/tits

Sometimes i tell him that I REALLY like him for his personality, and would he like to spend some time talking about our feelings, and then he knows im up for it.

I still want to know why these answers are sickening!

I found the sausage answers a little distasteful - in the light of the horsemeat scandal - who knows what kind of sausage you are going to get?

I'd hope that most of this meat these sausages have been fully labelled and the poster knows exactly which abattoir supplier they are coming from but I guess one can never really tell

I move from my sofa to his.
Or, in bed, drape my legs over him or spoon my bum against him

Occasionally, I will send a text like "you, me on the kitchen worktop" even if he is in the same house

He has a very fine trigger

I take my clothes off.
We don't have time enough for subtlety!

Tickle his tummy

'So are you gonna ravish me later?'

'Do you want to investigate my underwear?'

Or just sneak a grope.

Lol at putting the dog out and the one-leg-out technique (perhaps there's a gap in the market for one legged pjs.....)

We don't have a signal, it's "Fancy a bit", or "Wanna shag".

"How tired are you, on a scale of one to ten?"

I mostly just rub my cheek against his.

That sounds quite coy.

Don't worry, it heats up, sometimes we even leave the lights on.

As he is up silly early even on none work days he goes to bed a 10pm. I am a night person and will finish work papers until 2am sometimes.

All the above make it very easy for him to know if I am up for it. I just go to bed the same time as him.

The sad thing is when finished I get up and start working again.

I was worried that everyone else had subtle, romantic signals they used!

Pleased to see that they don't

DH's most frequent 'chat up' line is probably, 'D'ye wannae come over here and cuddle ma cock?'

I'll usually ask if he's planning on having a shave that evening. To let me know he'll come and give me a kiss and rub his cheek against mine so I'll know he's had a shave.

Or one of us will say 'shall we do rude things?'
Or we'll nuzzle until rude thing ensue.

We sometimes really are as pathetic as this:

"Do you want sex?"
"OK."

Susie: that's not pathetic, that's the definition of clear communication! At least there's no risk of misunderstanding.

did we find out what a Canadian shower is?

Shall we have sex now? (can't stand hints)

Me - 'get your coat,you've pulled'

Him-' you look 25'

Don't do the sex any more, but in tge past it'd be
"wanna do a sex" or similar.

If children were within suspected earshot we'd just dirty-talk in Polish.

Quick, its asleep in the cot for change I reckon we've got about 25 minutes (one sleep cycle). Do me now please.

RedRobin.........

Surely you know that according to MN forum lore, interfering with someone while they are asleep is sexual assault?

Is a Canadian shower something to do with poo?