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Fetish clubs

(28 Posts)
Littlechangeforthis Mon 19-Nov-12 19:06:21

Firstly, apologies for posting here, though it's probably more "appropriate" for chat, I really cant be bothered with the troll callers.

I have name-changed(ob) as have a few friends in RL on here.

So. Fetish clubs. "proper ones" I hope

Can someone tell me about them. What it's like. How full on/ what to expect?

Dp and I have been together about 9 months, and are both pretty sexually adventurous ( me more so after being in a celibate relationship for 4 years)

So this has been mentioned, and we are both pretty curious, although neither of us are into swapping. I would like to go, explore, see if it's for me/us, but I'm worried that I would stick out like a sore thumb/get it wrong/end up bound and gagged for all eternity.

Any pointers, experience would be great, am thinking some where like torture garden, but ob it's a bit less straight forward than searching on trip advisor.

Thanks

Guiltypleasures001 Mon 19-Nov-12 19:17:44

Hi op

The torture garden is brilliant and you couldnt have picked better first time..

its organised safe and secure to coin a phrase, there is security, first aid, and house Dommes or Masters, who are more than happy to chat to you all night if you want. The cosumes are amazing as are the floor shoes, I did a small public flogging excercise a few years ago on willing participants, and was happy to show techniques as well as safety tips etc. Google them they have a website and most if not all of the fetish sites are good sources of info, adult consent rings a bell but dont quote me, they are hot on etiquette (sp) and are above all safety conscious..

Happy playing

cronullansw Mon 19-Nov-12 19:27:55

Torture Garden - another vote xx

Guiltypleasures001 Mon 19-Nov-12 19:48:31

Informed consent ..

Littlechangeforthis Mon 19-Nov-12 21:15:39

Thanks for the info..l website is helpful. Just worried about turning up and looking like a twat blush

Guiltypleasures001 Mon 19-Nov-12 21:23:32

Most go in whatever they want, some in costume ..I saw one guy in a a pair of plimsoles and a eh hm hard on and that was it. be prepared for there being a room for shall we say couples as well, which is well where you can go to be intimate, theres always a queue for this room, and well attended.

If you go on the garden website you will see a lot of stuff made by the house of harlet (sp) and this pretty much can represent a lot of people there, including the guys. The thing is to go and see and just watch the people, as this is the fun bit. No one will judge you etc, be prepared for needle play demonstrations and suspention by hooks etc, this isnt on all the time, but might be on a night you go.

the scene is very friendly and any dodgy behaviour is seriously frowned on.
is there anything you are thinking of trying on want more details on at all?

Guiltypleasures001 Mon 19-Nov-12 21:26:51

If you go on on the informed consent web site they have a section called munch, this is their word for friendly meet ups for newbies and regulars, always in a pub or cafe etc. They have them up and down the country, most of the time there is someone who is happy to arrange to meet you there and introduce you to the members, they will answer any questions you might have.

Littlechangeforthis Mon 19-Nov-12 21:36:20

I don't think there is anything particular per se, just the whole scene/idea that does it for us?

Littlechangeforthis Mon 19-Nov-12 21:36:56

Thanks for the help, i really appreciate it.

SchroSawMummyRidingSantaClaus Mon 19-Nov-12 21:48:22

OP I am so very glad you started this thread because I have been too scared to.

I'd love to try a fetish club but am also terrified I will look a bit of a twat.

Darkesteyes Mon 19-Nov-12 22:21:17

Are these clubs accepting of you if you are overweight. I read an article about Killing Kittens in this months Easy Living (although its private sex parties rather than an actual fetish club) they say that people have to be slim and stunning and between the ages of 18 and 45.
Its not the first time ive seen something like this and the impossibly high standards would put me off tbh.
Although i couldnt afford KK prices anyway.

Guiltypleasures001 Mon 19-Nov-12 22:28:02

Sex parties have nothing to do with fettish clubs to be honest, and no they couldnt care less what you look like, the point is they accept you because they expect the same. I myself am a big bird, and have been made to feel very welcomed worshipped and have had many a fab time, remember that most of these people are for want of a word normal, who have families and day jobs, and may or may not want to broadcast their particular interests.

independentfriend Mon 19-Nov-12 22:44:17

Try fetlife, which is like a kinky version of Facebook.

What I know about TG is that it's a very dance-y club with more emphasis on looking fetish-y than on playing. That's info I have that's some years out of date, as those sorts of clubs aren't my thing. Do have a read around on fetlife - there are different sorts of fetish clubs, some with more emphasis on dance others where there is more play and others with particular focuses eg. on femdom or specifically queer clubs. In addition on fetlife or on Informed Consent you should be able to find a local munch (meet with kinky people in a pub/coffee shop or similar) where the locals should have opinions to share on the local clubs.

I find watching other people play can be a bit odd - whips/canes/other hitty toys can be louder than you're expecting. But IMO, it's worth trying out to see what, if any of it, you like.

SchroSawMummyRidingSantaClaus Mon 19-Nov-12 22:51:45

Fetlife is awful, I haven't logged on in over a year and I am still getting sleazy messages from random 'doms'. Bleurgh. sad

Littlechangeforthis Mon 19-Nov-12 22:54:13

I am a member of fetlife, although still very much finding my way around. I find it all very fascinating.

Darkesteyes you will "know" me from on here IYKWIM [

Tbh I don't know exactly what I am looking for.. Perhaps not a dancey club... Just something "more". There is a fantasy side to our relationship that we are both keen to explore.

There really should be a sex topic on MN.

Littlechangeforthis Mon 19-Nov-12 22:56:01

Thankfully I haven't signed up to anything on there... So quite happily browse in the background? .

SchroSawMummyRidingSantaClaus Mon 19-Nov-12 22:57:05

I can't remember if I signed up to anything on it, I don't think I did. I am pretty sure I was just registered as a member...

<runs to check>

Littlechangeforthis Mon 19-Nov-12 22:58:32

I might have used a different email but I don't think I have hand anything from them?

Some of the pictures are fascinating.. blush

SchroSawMummyRidingSantaClaus Mon 19-Nov-12 23:00:21

Just checked. I am apparently a member of 3 groups so I think you will probably be safe. grin

Littlechangeforthis Mon 19-Nov-12 23:02:11

PMSL grin

SchroSawMummyRidingSantaClaus Mon 19-Nov-12 23:02:26

Some of the pictures are a bit ermm... interesting. grin

No idea why I am getting all the messages, just logged in and have 27 unread PMs. :S I have 1 picture of my face and that's all there is.

SchroSawMummyRidingSantaClaus Mon 19-Nov-12 23:05:46

Oh... I have a friend request from someone who's picture is just him stroking his photoshopped massive cock...

Err... lovely.

Littlechangeforthis Mon 19-Nov-12 23:07:29

Some people have no manners grin

SchroSawMummyRidingSantaClaus Mon 19-Nov-12 23:10:04

I have just re-found DP's profile! shock

Wtf have I been missing. confused

SirBoobAlot Mon 19-Nov-12 23:15:30

We went to a fetish market with after party a little while back. Was the first time I'd been to one! Went with a friend as we were both curious and too scared to go alone. It was good! Very interesting, and you couldn't help but feel attractive, even just wearing normal clothes, because everyone was very open with compliments. No propositioning, but friendliness.

After they cleared the market away they then got out some dungeon equipment that you could go up and use. We just watched (our DPs joined us after work) but it was great fun, and fascinating.

Then we went home and had the most fantastic sex grin Separately, I should add wink.

My friend and I quite happily told people we were there for the first time, and they couldn't have been nicer about it, answered any questions we had.

I think if we go again (which we probably will) we would both put a bit more effort into dressing up a bit.

And what's the worst that could happen? You go, decide its not your scene, and leave. Give it a try smile

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