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Mysterious medical conditions that disappear after bad relationship ends

(62 Posts)
bouncyagain Mon 19-Nov-12 13:11:34

I am interested if other MNers have experienced anything like this.

I was with Ex DP for over ten years. About a year in, I developed a skin condition. It was unpleasant but not debilitating. I went to the GP lots of times, tried lots of different creams and so on. Nothing really worked. Ex DP always said it was caused by the clothes I wore, or that I didn't dry properly after showering and so on.

Then Ex DP ended the marriage. I met new DP. New DP noticed skin condition the first time we were unclothed, but did not say anything. By second time, it had gone. It has not come back. That was over a year ago. I am completely healed.

I now realise that the cause was the stressful relationship.

Have other MNers had a similar experience? I also share this as a happy story for any MNers who are in horrible stressful relationships that if the stress is removed then perhaps the medical condition may improve too.

CogitoErgoSometimes Mon 19-Nov-12 13:15:26

Dermatitis and IBS miraculously eradicated....

OhWesternWind Mon 19-Nov-12 13:17:25

My daughters dermatitis cleared up magically after her twat of a father left.

lubeybooby Mon 19-Nov-12 13:32:00

Years of depression completely cured with no relapse in five years so far

bouncyagain Mon 19-Nov-12 13:38:30

That's very interesting. I am very happy for you all.

The one thing I don't understand is the GPs. They always asked if I was stressed at work. Most of the time I wasn't. Not one of them ever asked if I had a horrible relationship with someone who thought that everything I did was wrong. Why not?

CogitoErgoSometimes Mon 19-Nov-12 13:40:06

You should raise it with your GP another time. I've occasionally had 'everything OK at home?' pitched at me so it's clear some are more alert to there being other types of stress. Yours probably needs a bit of education smile

bouncyagain Mon 19-Nov-12 13:42:46

Cogito yes, but it was not just one GP. These are big GPs practices. I must have seen at least three GPs, perhaps 4. Not one of them ever asked that question. Did I just get some rubbish GPs, or is it not obvious to them?

Charbon Mon 19-Nov-12 14:03:46

Thanks OP for posting this thread.

It is one of my hobby-horses that some GPs prescribe anti-depressant medication without ever enquiring of patients whether there is unhappiness in their personal relationships. Often depression is situational, not a chemical imbalance and sometimes feeling low is a normal response to a difficult situation and doesn't need pathologising.

I have met countless people whose mystery ailments have cleared up on exiting a bad relationship. These include skin conditions, chest pains, stomach and digestive disorders, respiratory and urinary tract infections. Less mysteriously I have known several people with gynaecological symptoms that have disappeared after a course of antibiotics for an unrelated health issue, just after exiting a relationship.....

IME depression is the most common disappearing condition when a bad relationship ends. Unfortunately this is often only realised after expensive and addictive anti- depressants have been prescribed by an incurious and badly trained GP.

CogitoErgoSometimes Mon 19-Nov-12 14:03:54

I think there are a lot of rubbish GPs in circulation unfortunately.

kernowgal Mon 19-Nov-12 14:16:58

Yep, IBS went. Found I was intolerant to lots of foodstuffs for ages and the intolerances magically disappeared about a month after we split. I still have the psoriasis on my feet but I think that is partly down to work stress.

My head is no longer crunched into my shoulders and I walk tall again.

kernowgal Mon 19-Nov-12 14:17:32

(I'd initially put the intolerances down to degree exam stress, but they continued afterwards.)

Milkandlotsandlotsofwine Mon 19-Nov-12 14:19:26

I had chronic lower back pain whilst I was with my ex (five years) & now it is almost completely gone.

I've replaced it with depression mind but I guess you can't have everything.

botandhothered Mon 19-Nov-12 14:23:18

Apparently my snoring was horrendous. My Ex used to wake me in the night to tell me to shut up, the lack of sleep made him very angry, sometimes for the whole day.

I felt terrible, I bought a few things over the counter, but nothing helped.

18months later I seem fully cured! My new partner is either lying, which I don't think he is, or I don't snore! I was so scared to sleep over with my new partner, and slept terribly for months.
What kind of fuck up convinces another person they have a problem, when they don't?

SirSugar Mon 19-Nov-12 14:31:56

H used to tell me there was definately something wrong with me as I would 'blow' approximately once a month (of course it had nothing to do with his abusive tactics hmm ) - since he died I'm cured.

I am also free of the terrible black depression that used to hang over me from time to time and the thought that the stress was going to kill me.

About three months after he passed away people started to comment on how well I looked.

HotDAMNlifeisgood Mon 19-Nov-12 14:34:06

Yup, IBS and psoriasis cleared up here too.

The IBS comes back in times of other kinds of stress, but I know it is completely stress-related now.

coffeeinbed Mon 19-Nov-12 14:38:54

Fibroids is a condition linked to bad relationship problems.
My GP asked told me that. She's brilliant.

Whatsmyproblem Mon 19-Nov-12 14:39:14

My panic attacks disappeared after I broke up with my abusive ex.

And also, a phobia that had previously been with me most of my life and was quite debilitating at times completely disappeared too. And it hasn't been back since.

coffeeinbed Mon 19-Nov-12 14:39:51

Sorry, on phone, so dodgy typing and deleting.

bigbuttons Mon 19-Nov-12 14:42:39

Yes, me too. I left ex last April. Had been with him for 15 tortuous years. I always seemed to be ill, horrendous bouts of flu etc etc. Now in the 7 months that I've been out I've not been ill once, even though these last 7 months have been incredibly incredibly worrying, difficult and stressful. One of the dc's commented last week that I wasn't ill any more. I would have expected to have come down with something by now, but no, not even a cold, even though all my kids have got sick, got better, got sick again.
Bloody brilliant ( now runs off to find a big piece of something wooden to touchwink)

After I married my soon to be abusive ex h I developed bad dermatitis under my wedding ring&it never shifted.
I have been married to my wonderful dh now for over 4yrs&have never had dermatitis under my wedding ringhmm

aefondkisses Mon 19-Nov-12 15:11:09

These stories are so inspiring...got dermatitis under wedding ring and just found out have third slipped disc (since we got married and not due to physical causes). Still undecided about separation, too much pain to physiological deal with first, but this thread gives reason for hope smile

NotSuchASmugMarriedNow Mon 19-Nov-12 16:03:12

When I was with my ex I suffered from

Migraines
Chronic Sinusitus
Depression
Numbness in arms and legs
Insomnia
IBS
High Blood Pressure
Hyperacusis
Binge Eating
Chronic Fatigue
Short Term memory Loss
Difficulties in concentrating

One week after I left him every single one of those conditions had gone with the exception of the high blood pressure which is better much now, but still a bit high. I was utterly astonished at the phsyical symptoms I had suffered and lived with.

He also continually told me I had Halitosis which made me afaid to open my mouth to speak to anyone, which I have since found out to be untrue.

Fucking arsewipe, good riddance to bad rubbish thats what I say.

bouncyagain Mon 19-Nov-12 17:07:22

I had the dermatitis under wedding ring thing too! Of course no wedding ring anymore (waves at Cash Converters).

I saw Ex DP's mum once at handover. She later commented to my mum how well I looked!

squishee Mon 19-Nov-12 17:19:11

That's funny bouncyagain. Before I jettisoned my Ex forever out of my life, he himself commented on how much healthier I was looking. Depression, insomnia and borderline eating disorder are all falling away.

While in a previous relationship that had gone downhill I developed quite bad psoriasis that went away after it ended, and never came back.

I think this sort of thing is quite common. Food for thought though...

angelpinkcar Mon 19-Nov-12 18:11:38

Ha Ha how true, I had a hideous rash on my face for months and now its gone, I also thought I was depressed or going through the menapause and H kept telling me to go and gets some anti depressents I refused ,got rid of him and everyone comments on how well I look, have lost over a stone and changed the colour of my hair. See what you missing loser (to EXH)

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