Dispatches, 8pm tonight about DV

[showtunesgirl]

www.channel4.com/programmes/dispatches/episode-guide/series-115/episode-3

May be of interest to some people.

[izzyizin]

Unfortunately this piece of essential viewing clashes with Panorama's report on the BBC/Jimmy Saville.

I'll endeavour to record tonight's Dispatches and watch it later but my intitial reaction is that, much in the same way as Tina Nash failed to end her relationship with a man who repeatedly abused her, women who become involved with violent men rarely heed the warnings of others

[foolonthehill]

some of us do

[Meglet]

I though Panorama was on late tonight?

[BabblingWreckSimianBrain]

Tina Nash was on R2 this lunchtime talking to Vanessa Feltz. She said she still 'loved' her abuser, even several months after he'd blinded her.
It was a horrific interview and has left me (never been subjected to DV) very upset. Something that struck me during the interview when VF asked her 'and what advice would you give to others who are experiencing DV?' Tina didn't say what I wanted her to say which was 'tell them to get out. Now'.

[izzyizin]

Is Panorama on later? I thought it was scheduled for 8.30pm.

Some do, fool, but far too many don't.

[BabblingWreckSimianBrain]

Panorama is on BBC1 at 10.35pm. Presumably scheduling to air after watershed.
Dispatches is on C4 at 8pm.

[showtunesgirl]

I think Tina Nash's story is interesting though as it shows that emotions aren't cut and dry. Yes, the logical thing would be to run and run as fast and as far as you can but you only need to take a look at the Relationships threads here that reality is much more difficult to deal with.

[fuckadoodlepoopoo]

Ooh might watch that.

[fuckadoodlepoopoo]

Who is tina nash?

[BabblingWreckSimianBrain]

Well I watched it and it was depressing viewing.

[BertieBotts]

I'll probably 4od it later.

Warnings may be pointless in individual situations but anything that gets people talking and raises awareness of DV is a good thing IMO.

[fuckadoodlepoopoo]

Its on 4+1 at the moment. Its shocking what happened to that poor woman. It made me feel ill.

[FrillyMilly]

What happened to her was awful but can she honestly say she would have left him had she known about his past? The programme just highlighted why Clare's law will not work and passed the blame on to the victims.

[HissyByName]

If it serves nothing else other than to show agencies the need to TRY to warn victims, to join the dots and see that an abuser IS an abuser, even if he has no charges/convictions against him.

It's THINKING ABUSE that needs to happen, not just to assume everything is OK cos there's no record.

It will change the way society treats victims. That has to be a good thing.

Long journey, but no longer than the proportionat length of time victims spend being tormented, tortured etc.

Abusers need to know that they may stay out of Police records, but that's not enough to keep everything under wraps. There will be NO hiding place for those that harm others for their own warped needs.

[fuckadoodlepoopoo]

Frilly. Does it matter if she would have left? I would have left my abusive relationship and in their survey 75% said they would have. You can't dismiss the whole thing because you doubt the action that one woman would have taken.

[FrillyMilly]

In the programme she implied that if she had known she would have left, that she would have benefitted from Clares law. My worry is the women on the programme, for example, who where told their partners had been abusive and stayed. Who gets the blame when the partner beats up that woman or kills her? A lot of people will say 'why didn't she leave, she knew he beat up his exes, the police warned her, it's her own fault'. I do not think this way but am well aware many do. Will this law stop abusers abusing? I seriously doubt it. The money would be better spent handing out tougher sentences to abusers and putting in place support for victims.

[BertieBotts]

Sorry to bump an old thread, have only just got around to watching this. Tina's story was horrific :(

I felt like the overall story though (not tina's but talking about DV in general) was very simplified and the reasons given about victims not leaving were massively simplified. It kept being repeated "She was scared" - I know that fear plays a massive part, but bigger IME is the fact that you minimise it to survive, they minimise it, they seem sorry, that to leave feels like "giving up" and that is a failure, that you love the abuser. So many other things that "She was scared" is such a tiny part of the reason. I know they only have half an hour and aim to reach a wide audience, and it's the easiest reason for people to understand, but I still felt it could have said more, because there is so much more.

Plus, I honestly don't believe that that 75% would have left if given that information. It reminds me too much of "If he ever hits me, I'll leave" kind of thinking, which never happens either. It's very difficult when in an abusive relationship to follow logical trains of thought because you are always second guessing yourself and your sense of logic gets twisted as well to favour them. You think you would react in a certain way, but you don't :(

And as for the part where they said that they can disclose to the perpetrator if they feel it appropriate! How is that EVER appropriate or in any way helpful to anybody apart from the abuser themselves! FFS!

After watching it even though the programme was biased slightly in favour it's made me feel like it would be a waste of time and resources that could be distributed and used so much better.

[HappyNewHissy]

But we have to try Bertie, anyway we can, to hope that just ONE woman would get out earlier.