A couple of years ago my wife was diagnosed with bipolar disorder. She was also diagnosed with PTSD and a severe case of Amaxophobia due to car accident she had. Of course, all these problems are linked together, and her therapist has prescribed medications to treat the bipolar disorder and psychotherapy for the PTSD and her phobia. The Divalproex she is taking seems to be working a little, but she still has episodes.
I have a problem though. With all the problems that we have had over the years, her diagnosis was like a final nail in the coffin. Since then we have grown farther apart. I try to help, I try to be supportive...I have to do most everything outside the house that is not within walking distance.
But...I am not in love with her anymore. Things have just grown to distant for me to have any real feelings. I feel like a robot going through the motions. I don't want to hurt her, but I don't think maintaining a loveless relationship is good for either one of us.
About a month ago I met someone. We seem to have a lot in common, and I have been talking to her about things I have never been able to talk to my wife about. I think I might be falling for her, but I am scared to take any steps in that direction. It tears me up inside.
The worst part is...I know if I leave, I have to take the kids with me. My wife can't take care of the kids in her condition, and her therapist said it could take years before she improves. It's not that she doesn't try to be a good mother, but I can't trust her to do what needs to be done, especially as her phobia is concerned. Even now, I often worry about what will happen while I am at work while the kids are at the house.
Any advice would be appreciated.
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Relationships
Worried about my marriage
11 replies
Targelor · 30/06/2011 14:48
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