Intimacy after seperation.

[mrsmillsfanclub]

Dh and I seperated four months ago after more than a decade together following a couple of very difficult years, unemployment, miscarriages, stress with our families, etc. I came very close to going down the divorce road, but our feelings for each other didn't change, and there was no issue over fidelity.
We have lived apart all this time (he moved back in with his family many miles away) and myself and dc (not his) remained in our home. We have spoken on a daily basis all this time and have decided we want to make another go of things. We are taking it very slowly and meeting up for a few days (for the first time) within the next month.
The worry I have is with intimacy. We were not intimate for a long time before we seperated (all on my part) and of course thats one thing I have to work on (when Im down my libido is the first thing to go). A lot of hurtful things were said between the two of us and we were both devastated when we split, the thought of jumping straight into an intense physical relationship unnerves me slightly, how can we get that level of intimacy back when its been out of the picture for so long??

[2010Dad]

No experience myself, but if I were in your (or your DH's) situation, hugs, cuddles, kisses would be the natural starting point and all I'd want for a while. The rest will surely follow when it feels right.

[mrsmillsfanclub]

Thanks 2010. I feel exactly the same, just concerned that I should be shelling out on candles and soft lighting. Don't know why, I never have before, suppose I think I should be making lots more effort.