Changing schools at Y3?

(31 Posts)
Vixxxen Tue 28-Jan-14 19:23:55

Has anyone done this and for what reasons?

I think I will be able to change dd's school next term, I am very excited because this was my 1st school choice and she has been on the waiting list for this long, but she is settled and happy...not sure if I should do it or not.

Pros
-Christian ethos (we are Christians)
-More Academic (dd is struggling with her learning now)
-More strict (dd doesn't have behavioural problems as such but do things behind my back/teacher back and lies sometimes)
-Breakfast club, wrap around care and loads of after school clubs, school bus (parents helping each other with the school run)
Parents are well involved in the school

Cons
-Further away (15 min walking instead of 5)
-Bigger school with more children
-Obviously she will be the new girl (however she is very sociable)

Also dd was flagged as dyslexic this year and is not improving much. The new school is the only one in the borough which has a quality mark for dyslexia.
In the current school the parents don't get much involved and the majority don't even make an effort to say good morning to each other unless you are part of their closed group. Also some of the parent's parenting style at school grounds and gates is appalling, I hate when my dd see her friends treated that way.

I like the current school, the grounds, the staff and I feel like betraying them if I move dd, but children do come and go they won't care that much will they? I just feel that dd would benefit more from the other school, that is all.

What do I do?

Vixxxen Tue 28-Jan-14 21:32:54

Anyone?

2whippetsnobed Tue 28-Jan-14 21:38:47

From your op it sounds like you are absolutely sure this is the right school for your dd. I would say go for it. Children adapt and schools are used to children coming and going.

Dromedary Tue 28-Jan-14 21:42:32

I would just make the change and not worry about it. From what you say she will be fine, and as both schools are local can still see any special friend from the old school.
I'm also looking into changing schools at that age, but due to a problem with the first school. Much more difficult for us as huge transport problems if we change school. DC is very happy at current school, but loves the thought of moving as she feels it would be exciting. I would have no concerns about her settling in.

Vixxxen Tue 28-Jan-14 21:47:14

Thanks for your comment.
The school looks perfect on paper and it was my 1st choice when I applied for primary but it is scary even to think about moving her because I don't know the school a part from one quick visit and their website.
I am scared of dd not settling in (even though she settles in ok at pretty much everything we do - she went to a private nursery from 2-3, than state nursery, reception up to now in the current school). I am scared of her being left out and not making friends at the new school or not getting on with new teachers.
It would be easier if there was a problem but she is genuinely happy at this school...I just think she would be much more stimulated and use more of hr potential in the new school.
Also I am changing jobs after summer and having breakfast club and wrap around care will be a life saver. I would have to use a CM if I keep her where she is.

Vixxxen Tue 28-Jan-14 21:49:43

TBH the only friend at the current school that she will miss greatly is moving cities anyway.

All of her other best friends are not from the current nor new school.

potterpaint Wed 29-Jan-14 09:30:39

I was in a similar situation re schools as you. Moved dd to our first choice in Y3. Oh wow, can't believe I hesitated (and nearly didn't take up the place). It has been completely wonderful. Transition difficult - dd was very unhappy before she started and I would say it took her a year to be fully settled. But that year was still absolutely brilliant. Another girl with dyslexia started at the same time - she has also had a great time, as have two girls who joined in Y4.

Generally speaking girls of this age are up for making new friendships, and are quite interested in new pupils (in dd's school that is definitely how it works).

Just do it and don't worry. Once you are there, you won't feel guilty - just relieved.

potterpaint Wed 29-Jan-14 09:31:51

PS When I say the transition was difficult, I mean dd was sad. Nobody at the new school realised she found it hard, and the teacher said she integrated well right from the start. She's just a loyal person and felt bad about her old school. We still keep in touch with friends from there two years later.

Vixxxen Wed 29-Jan-14 09:49:01

potterpaints thanks for your input! makes me feel ore positive about the change!

Can I ask you: was your dd at the waiting list and than she was called to the new school on Y3? At what point of the year? How did you tell the old school you were moving her? Did you have to give any particular reasons?
My dd is still on the waiting list but she is now number 3. When I applied for a reception place she was number 28 or something like that.
I heard that from Y2 lots of children go to independent schools so I am keeping my fingers crossed, hoping that her space will come up for Y3, but when will I find out? Hopefully before the holidays so she starts a new year already in the new school.

I feel bad because I don't have loads of bad things to say about the current school, I like the leadership, love the SENCO and they were the ones who agreed to get dd assessed, although I had to push for it.
Just the morning dd was telling me that her teacher is so proud of her!

BaBaSheep Wed 29-Jan-14 11:43:20

My dd is moving to a new school on this coming Monday. She is moving into a small school from big school. She is very looking forward to being a new girl at the moment. The new school told me that they will allocate a child to help dd to settle in their school. I believe once dd got one or two friends to play with at break time dd will be settled. I am giving dd a little farewell party with a few of her very close friends from the old school this weekend.

BaBaSheep Wed 29-Jan-14 12:18:14

By the way I can associate with how you feel about leaving the current school. But the bottom line is to you it is more personal but to the staff in the school it is just where they work. Of course good teachers do care about their pupils but even teachers themselves they move in and out of school when new opportunities suit them. The old school only needs to know when dd is leaving and where & when dd's going.

MilkRunningOutAgain Wed 29-Jan-14 15:54:17

I'm probably going to do the same, DS is off to secondary in Sept and dd has had temp teachers, and lots of them, which is unsettling , for over a year. So I think I'll move dd to a school nearer to our new house. Good luck with your dd's move, I'm sure it will go well.

caz05 Wed 29-Jan-14 18:32:15

I moved my son schools in year 3 due to issues with the school senco. My son was diagnosed with dyslexia at 7 and the school was simply useless so I decided to do some research at other local schools and decided to move him. He left yr 3 in February to at start his new school and it was the best thing I ever did for him. He settled into his new school instantly and made friends easily and he never felt like "the new kid". He has now been at new school for nearly a year and now in year 4 and the school have been amazing with regards to his dyslexia and doing everything the other school should have also been doing (but weren't). In my case the move was defiantly the right thing to do and I don't regret it for a money. He still also sees his old friends from the old school for play dates etc which is lovely.

Vixxxen Wed 29-Jan-14 19:55:03

Hi caz was it the school who diagnosed your son?

Nonie241419 Wed 29-Jan-14 22:13:22

I teach in Year 3, and we usually have a few new starters during the year. They always settle in amazingly quickly. This year, since September, I've had 8 new starters in my class and they have all integrated fantastically.

Vixxxen Wed 29-Jan-14 23:11:07

Thanks nonie
Hope the place will become available for DD.

caz05 Thu 30-Jan-14 06:37:23

No vixxxen it wasn't. It was actually a family member who was also a primary school teacher that mentioned it but the school weren't interested in the idea and where no help at all and I don't think school can arrange for assessments anyway so you have to pay for the test to be done privately. It was costly but worth it, although even with the official diagnosis and report his old school still weren't interested. New school has been amazing and completely taken it all on board

headoverheels Thu 30-Jan-14 06:51:56

My DS1 is in year 3, there have been two new girls in his class over the last two terms and both have settled in well. I would move her for the dyslexia reason alone.

I did it in a very similar situation to milks

Children are very adaptable at this age IME. Her new school is less of a hot house but she is very happy and doing well.

Vixxxen Thu 30-Jan-14 14:50:23

So, for everyone who did it: were your children in the waiting list or the schools you anted were undersubscribed anyway?

caz05 Thu 30-Jan-14 15:26:48

I had to put mine on a waiting list and he was number 3 and when the place became available the other 2 ahead of us no longer wanted/needed the place. I think tends to be easier to move the higher up the school years you go as there are less people on say a yr3 waiting list compared to a reception class waiting list. Phone around the other potential schools and see if there is a waiting list and what number you would be. I think you can put your name on more then one list if you wanted too

Vixxxen Thu 30-Jan-14 15:32:00

Thanks caz
There is only one school where I would move dd to and she is number 3 on the waiting list.

BaBaSheep Thu 30-Jan-14 19:32:32

I did it for the same reason to Milk. My dc1 is still going to the old school until summer then Sept comes my dc1 will be going to the secondary school just down the road. I will have to run between two schools until summer holiday. Hopefully it is a short term pain long term gain situation. The new school is a very popular, over oversubscribed outstanding school. I wouldn't possibly get my dd in from yR even if we were already the area. However we are just very lucky we put an in-Year-Application while a couple of yr3 children were about to move out of the area so we got the second vacant place. It all happened very quick. If I didn't accept the offer now there may not be another place again.

tallulah Thu 30-Jan-14 20:36:04

We moved 2 of ours in Y3. We were very unhappy with the previous school. Neither of them knew anyone in the new schools but settled quickly, and now they are adults we are still pleased we moved them.

Gini99 Thu 30-Jan-14 20:47:05

I moved my yr 2 DD at the start of this term and she has settled in very quickly. It seems a good age to move as, as someone up the thread said, they seem very happy to make new friends and haven't yet got into very fixed groups.

DD is the kind of child who gets on with people easily but is not naturally one of the uber-popular types. She'd also been physically bullied by a particular child in her old school so I was a bit worried about settling in. She seems to have made friends very easily, chats about games they play in the playground and has had invitations to play/parties. We're very pleased we've moved. We've still seen a couple of her closest friends from the old school and that was nice. If they are real friendships that will work. I feel a bit of the new girl too after knowing everyone at the school gate!

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