Hi everyone, newbie here and looking for advice... My (just) 5 year old started school in September and it's a bit of a trauma at present. She had gone to nursery full time from 6 months old with absolutely no issues- hitting all milestones, made friends easily, loved going etc but School seems to be another ball game.
Her (newly qualified) teacher has had me in on a number if occasions due to issues with her attention and concentration - she isn't listening and they only manage to get her on task about 50% of the time. Listening at home can be an problem but have started to get down to her level and be firm with her and I've started to see an improvement.
She also struggles with the rules and often runs off without waiting In Line e.g to go to dinner.
School have now suggested a referral to an Additional Needs Service and am panicking that as a parent I have missed something... I work with young people/children with ads/add and haven't noticed any similar traits in my little girl.
So far they have put in place a visual timetable for her and did a week of a reward chart - both of these did appear to be helping but then the various Xmas activities they are doing seem to have disrupted this.
They have said that they have concerns as she's very intelligent and they don't want her to fall behind. She still enjoys school and we chat every morning about what she needs to do to have a great day - we also talk about what she's done brilliantly on the way home...
At home we read together and I have never had an issue with getting her to do her homework which she enjoys doing. We also have a reward chart and am always mindful to praise her when she listens well...
Can anyone suggest any tips for me to help improve her focus and attention?
Thanks in advance....
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Primary education
How can I help my daughter?
NancyBoots · 09/12/2013 12:45
Welcome to MN 
Can anyone suggest any tips for me to help improve her focus and attention?. Yes, just wait. She is 5 and she hasn't even done a complete term yet. Your NQT might just not have had enough experience, what does the Senco and Head think if your DDs behaviour? Have they discussed it with you? If not, I'd be tempted to ask for a meeting with her teacher, the person responsible for Senco and the head.
In the meantime I'd get her eyes tested and ask school about a referral for a hearing test.
You might also want MNHQ to move this thread to primary education as I think there are some posters who are primary School Teachers. You can do this by clicking on report and just asking them to move it 
My ds struggled to settle at first. We focused on one issue at a time and spent a lot of time role playing eg I was the teacher and he had to be quiet, remember to put his hand up,etc. Then we'd switch and he could be the teacher 
I also chatted with the teacher to identify any trigger points eg being in bigger groups; taking part in activities that were less structured. Then I'd chat with ds at home about what the expectations were in those areas and he'd get an extra special sticker if he behaved well.
We didn't have a problem with staying in line but we did have an issue about going into school at first, and I sat down with ds and gave him ownership of making a plan for going into school. We could both suggest how he could make that problem better ie it was non-negotiable that he had to go in but he could decide if he held our hands or walked in front; he could decide who did drop off. He came up with a plan that worked for him. I wonder if something similar would work for your dd with staying in line?
tbh getting ds to stay quiet is still a work in progress but the other issues have all ironed out.
We still have bedtime stories, daily chats and a reward chart that reinforce the points he struggles with.
I hope you're referral meeting goes well. They seem to have suggested it very quickly.
Hearing tests? Were they ENT or school based? You need a good ENT check. Also if it's glue ear (very common) she can have it one week, not the other. Ds had a test last May which he got better than average hearing for his age. Beginning of October I glanced at the hearing test, and commented "That's not good" and the ENT consultant said "actually it's worse" 
Summer hearing tests give markedly better results than the winter. the only point in the summer ones for him is to see how well his natural hearing is.
I think it's unusual to have referrals in reception. In my experience they don't tend to do that after a term unless there's specific things they've spotted. It's often the parents fighting for it, and the schools saying "well, they're young..."
If there isn't anything to spot, then they won't spot it. If there is, then the earlier the better.
Although it is good that they have given a referral so quickly, I would be concerned that the paperwork raises issues that they haven't discussed with you eg hitting the TA. There could be a few different reasons for hitting, it's not necessarily a lack of empathy 
.
I'm not sure how quickly they move to a referral without putting strategies in place but ime dcs' school allowed the Reception children at least six months to adjust to their new environment before putting strategies in place, which means any statement or referral probably wouldn't happen until the following year.
Does she attend any out-of-school activities? Have they raised similar concerns? Of course she may be responding differently at school but if other, independent adults aren't raising concerns about eye contact, etc, then I would mention that to the school to help them gain a deeper understanding of what your dd is like in different environments.
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