Ds suddenly crying when I drop him off.

[MummyPig24]

Ds is in foundation stage 2 and really loves it, is popular, has lots of friends and is progressing well. However he has literally had to be peeled off me the last two mornings at drop off time.

Yesterday I thought he was a bit worried about football club which he does after school each Monday so I agreed to go and watch him. In the end he really didn't want to go so I didn't force him. This morning he said someone isn't nice to him, they spit at him, but he doesn't know their name. Then he was saying he has a tummy ache and wanted to go home with me. It was heartbreaking, I was so close to tears myself.

He attended foundation stage 1 last year and loved it, never cried. What has happened to my happy little boy? What can I do to help him feel ok about going to school again?

[learnandsay]

Get to the bottom of it. You can't leave him stressed and upset. Speak to the teacher and get it sorted out.

[MummyPig24]

One of the teachers said they would try to get to the bottom of it today but he may not tell her. They phoned me to say he was ok. I am not leaving him there stressed, I made sure he was being taken care of.

[PastSellByDate]

Hi MummyPig24:

This is a change in behaviour and I think it's aboslutely normal to be concerned. It may be nothing but it is worth making sure your son can talk to you or somebody at the school. Talking to the teacher was definitely the right thing to do.

Try and find out from the Teacher if there are playground buddies or if there is a bully box - or other ways your DS can let someone know he's not happy about how he's being treated. Perhaps you could find a story book about bullying which could raise some of these issues? Or if a tv show touches on this you could possibly discuss it and that might make him more open about his own situation.

Quite often reception (I'm presuming he's reception age) children are kept separate from older children for a term or so and then gradually allowed to mix with older children more frequently. This can sometimes mean that older children can have run-ins with younger children. And yes this can also be when bullying starts. So it may be worth finding out if something is different this term.

If you know older children in the school (possibly freinds' children or through clubs) gently ask them to keep an eye on your DS at recess. They tend to love the responsibility and may be better able to explain to grownups what is going on and who's doing it.

Obviously you want to find out what is worrying him - but asking more and more questions may be upsetting for him. Just keep signalling that you're aware something is troubling him and that you're happy to listen if he wants to talk about it.

HTH

[MummyPig24]

Thank you very much of your post past. Ds is in reception and you are right it is only this term that they have been allowed to mix with the ks2 children. He said a boy in yr 5 or 6 has been pretending to hit him in the face with his lunchbox and calling him names.

The next morning after he told us he went into school happy as larry and I spoke to one of the foundation stage teachers. Ds also went to school happy this morning so I'm pleased that it seems to have been resolved.

He has lots of friends so I'm fairly confident it was just a blip. I think he feels able to talk to dp and I so that is good, we will keep reassuring him that he can talk to us about anything.

[PastSellByDate]

Hi MummyPig24

Glad to hear things have calmed down and I'm certain half-term will help. Just keep signalling to him that if he's having problems with older children to immediately go and tell a playground monitor/ buddy (school-aged playground support helpers) or a grown-up in charge of the playground.

It sounds like you have great lines of communication - and that's the real secret, which will help with so many things as he grows up.

Hope that's this months worry over for you - as one very wise friend said once, the thing with children PSBD is that whatever you're worrying about right now won't be what you're worrying about 6 weeks from now.

Hope it all blows over.