Looking for a school

[WATeresaPerkins]

I know this is somewhat premature with my DS only being 2 but I like to be organised.

My DP and I have been having discussions lately about schooling for the DS when the time comes. DP wants him to go the local Catholic school, whilst I want him to go the local Non-Dom school.

I don't like the idea of my DS being seperated from all other faiths as I think that could lead to intolerences in later live (please don't take offence if you went to a faith school)

I know that both have pro's and con's

So what say you, the parents of mumsnet

Many Thanks
T x

[HeadFairy]

is your dp catholic? I know it's a daft questions but it all does depend on how important his faith is to him.

Personally I don't like faith schools at all, esp single faith schools, I went to one and I do feel I missed out on a huge chunk of my education. As an example, I was doing A level biology and my biology teacher was a nun and she didn't teach us any human reproduction. At all. I went to crammers the Easter before my A levels and they were really shocked I'd missed such a big chunk out the curriculum out.

I also feel the education of religious matters is incredibly one sided. My sister (who's all for single faith schools, sends her girls to a very devout Catholic school) says that they are being educated with a Catholic ethos, but I feel that too often that's to the exclusion of other faiths. I was taught absolutely nothing of Islam, Judaism, Sikhism, Hinduism, anything of any other religion. To me that's not an education, that's an indoctrination.

[CaringSharing]

A Catholic school.

Bit too many 'Gary Glitters' in there if you ask me.

If you are religious, then it is your choice.

I do not think the state shoud sponsor any kind of Sectarian schooling.

Especially for that lot. Their track record with kids is very alarming.

[WATeresaPerkins]

He is Catholic yes and he is fairly devout.

Your response has backed up my worries in the fact it is almost apartheid schooling in the way that they are kept apart and not taught of other faiths.

In general, what is the Standard of Single faith schools like?

[Simbacat]

Depends where you live?

Many catholic schools are outstanding- often the best secondary in an area. Sometimes you are prioritized for a secondary place if you have been to a catholic primary.

[newgirl]

best advice is to go and visit them and really get a feel for them - both of you

[WATeresaPerkins]

I live near Falkirk in Scotland - I haven't specifically looked at schools yet and don't actually know the school for which I am in the catchment for. Obviously these discussions are in the very early stages. However at the moment I am against the idea and am probably not even open to the concept of being persuaded just because of my beliefs

[CaringSharing]

They are bigot factories. A catholic can become a head teacher at any school, yet a non-catholic will not be allowed to become a head teacher at a catholic school.

This is discrimination, and these people are tasked with educating children. These two facts don't add up.

There have been recent stirrings in the Northern Ireland assembly regarding the separation of children at the age of five on a religious factor contributing to the sectarian problem there.

I know it's not quite so bad here on the mainland, but if I was George Osbourne I could have found a few billion by ceasing to fund this sham.

[WATeresaPerkins]

CS - I am guessing you have first hand experience of these "bigot factories"

Please share with all us MNers

[Snuppeline]

Not sure how it is in Scotland but around here (London) you need to be very devout indeed to get into a catholic primary school so that would mean going to church every sunday plus chipping in through charity events etc, get a recommendation from the father to accompany the school application and obviously your ds would need to be baptised. They also take a look at the date of baptism in my area (or so I am told) to ensure that parents don't baptise their children as catolics close-ish to the application deadline just to be able to say their kids are catholic(and would question why a child would be baptised after 3months as catholics believe the soul of a child dying before baptism would be in purgatory, or at least that's what I've been told, so parents would rush to get their dc baptised as quickly as possible. Evidently therefore a good test of real faith versus "want to get into that school faith". But like I said I'm in London and its a bit more fierce here!) So do you go to church every sunday? Is your ds baptised? Check that your ds meet the application criteria. The schools can be very religious in focus at a faith-based school (school assembly with mass, parents evenings with prayer content, lots of religious content to any holiday period - i.e. easter much more about jesus resurrection much less about bunnies and easter eggs; christmas more about jesus birth and not so much about santa and pressies).

Think about what sort of childhood you want your ds (and future children) to have and how you think the school fits in with your desired family life (dh and you prepared to go to mass every-sunday-without-fail?). That and looking around the schools is probably my best advise!

[CaringSharing]

I was a supply teacher for many years and worked in a variety of schools across the central belt.

The arrogance and blatant discrimination in the staff room is mind boggling.

In one of the more 'devout' establishments and believe me, this would be the last place I would wish a child to be educated, especially if they are admitted to the school under the 'heathen' or 'Orangie' intake as they like to describe their non believing pupils.

Honestly, you would be shocked.

[WATeresaPerkins]

Snuppeline - from what your saying it appears as if these devout faith schools are attempting to rob their pupils of their childhood eg. EasterBunny and Santa etc.
That and it sounds like a lot of commitment to the cause for their schooling - Is it really worth the hassle?

CS - your experiences are mind boggling - please tell me this doesn't happen. We hear of the stories etc but surely they are rarities

[CaringSharing]

Unfortunately, it is the norm in Scotland. It's almost encouraged, although some of those 'teachers' and staff I met needed no encouragement.

Glasgow city council were definately the worst. If the voters knew the truth they would revolt. New Labour.......New vatican more like.

It may be different in England, but Scotland, and apparently Northern Ireland as well need to have a major review of this.

[HeadFairy]

caringsharing, I was holding back a bit in case I offended anyone, but I do agree with a lot of what you say. I would rather my ds went to a failing school than a Catholic one, it's that bad. I honestly had never heard of Islam until I was in my late teens, and I grew up in Croydon which really pretty ethnically diverse. I had no idea about any religions and if you're offering a religious education I think that's a pretty poor show.

I was also really pretty much indoctrinated about matters like abortion and contraception. We were shown videos of abortions being carried out and photos of aborted babies when were only 13 Sadly enough we had quite a few teenage pregnancies in my year which might well have been avoided if the girls hadn't been told that contraception was unnatural and against God's way.

My sister has bent over backwards to get her girls in to a catholic school. She says she changed her views on religion when her first dd was born, I don't know if that's true, she really didn't go to church much before she was born, but perhaps she did see things differently. However, their primary school is incredibly devout, the parish priest is Opus Dei. She has to help out at the children's liturgy and do these weekend camp things with the children to "score" extra points.

She's desperate to get her dd1 in to our old secondary school but she's been told she hasn't got a chance because her dd1 was born before my sister and her dp married. It actually makes me feel really angry that at a time of so many cuts that state money is used to fund these schools which are so discriminatory.

[WATeresaPerkins]

If it is so bad, then why is it not openly reported in the press?

[soccerwidow]

If your Catholic, your children were babtised Catholic (whilst babies), you go to church on a Sunday more often than not, you want your child to grow up within the Catholic Faith then send them to Catholic School.

If you are only sending them because some flawed league table said that they were the best school in the area, don't.

Simples.

[omydarlin]

I went to a really good Catholic School in terms of the range of education about other religions and sex ed - it was quite surprising really when i talk to my friends who went to different schools some of them hardly had any there - I understand that there is a difference in the schools though in that some (voluntarily maintained?) can choose their curriculum and some can't. At the time I went to my primary school it was under-subscribed so I suspect lots of children from families with an afinity to the faith were allowed in I hear its very heavily oversubscribed now (epsom queen of commuterland) but I happen to know the Headteacher isn't Catholic - maybe its all about the school and perhaps you should go and look at it ad ask them about what they teach. I must add years of going to a Catholic school didn't turn me into a devout Catholic - I suppose I am vaguely Christian though.

The only difference between the secondary schools imo was that we weren't single sex!

[CaringSharing]

It does not get the publicity, to to collusion, by the governing bodies, the church and the press themselves.

As for Opus Dei, the fact Cherie Blair is such a valued member of this shows what an odious shower they are.

I hate that bloody woman.

Sorry to rant on, but due to experience and the treatment I saw and was on the recieving end of, I really am quite angry about this subject.

[CaringSharing]

Omydarlin

So your not one of the 13% that became a stripper?

Or maybe 13% of strippers that had a catholic education. :)

[michelle16]

I attended a Catholic Primary School, but not a high school as the local non-dom high was only a few minutes walk away.

I'd encourage you NOT to send your kids to a Catholic school. My 2 don't go, and I'm glad I left.

I didn't know there were other "credible" religons until I got to High school.

[omydarlin]

caringsharing no - but i should imagine in the right circumstances I could have - that was before i fell in love and lived in sin for 10 years!!

Seriously though some schools are different so just go and look - i don't know anything about opus dei but then again is it possible that Catholics have got worse ??!?! I havn't been to church for over a decade maybe i'm out of it - was all quite innocent and verging on "happy clappy" (Jesus at the altar surrounded by a lovely rainbow, folk based hymns from new hymnals) Maybe its all got super strict and eerie!

[omydarlin]

Headfairy - St Phils - if so I used to feel really sorry for you lot with your lovely coloured uniform - and we'd heard about the super strictness of the school but didnt know it was that bad!! Sounds horrific especially the videos _ i do vaguely remember telling my friend that went to St Phils we practised putting condoms on bananas and she was shocked beyond belief!

[HeadFairy]

Not St Phils, I agree those uniforms were horrible. No we were the "other" lot in Shirley...