My eldest ds started high school 4 weeks ago. He has gone to a different school from all of his primary school friends. He is bright, conscientious, polite and kind. He is getting picked on by a boy who lives in our town and travels to school with him and is in his class. Silly things like throwing his pencils on the railway line, criticising him for doing as he's told, making fun of me and dh in front of the rest of the class. Difficult thing is that this boy, one other (who is easily influenced by this boy) and my ds are the only 3 kids who attend this school from our town. The other parents are keen for the 3 boys to be friends and do stuff together. THey are unaware that this is going on.
I am hoping that this is just boys establishing the pecking order and that it wont last long. I have encouraged ds to cultivate friendships with other boys who he likes. How long should I let him deal with it on his own and if I do need to take action what should I do?
Have you spoken to the school? A good school would be clamping down on this straight away.
My DD had problems with a boy last year. He got put in detention straight away after the first incident, then when he tried to punish her for "telling" he was whisked away to isolation. By continually clamping down, he got the message that such behaviour was unacceptable. This year he is treating her in an acceptable way, so she hasn't even asked to be moved in the one lesson where he has been sat next to her.
Good schools do take this kind of thing much more seriously than they used to. Your son should also keep a diary of any bullying events, in case it is needed later.
Tell the school first and if this doesn't work, tell the other parents. Encourage your DS to make other friends in his class. There will I'm sure be other kids who would welcome a friend who is as nice as your DS.