Preschool and working parent- WWYD?

[Doubleespressostat]

Hi, my DD 2.10 started preschool this September. She attends 5 mornings a week during term time (0900 till midday). I think she is still getting used to nursery as she often says she doesn't want to go to nursery in the mornings. A few times, she has been hysterical when I have taken her in. Her keyworker says she is happy there and I have a very good feeling about the place.

My issue is that I work 3 days a week so her nanny picks her up from preschool and looks after her for the rest of the day. On the other days that I'm off, she still goes to preschool in the mornings. I feel guilty about this as I feel she should be at home spending quality time with me. I'm not sure if I should pull her out and restart next September.

Part of me thinks she should continue as it is good preparation for school and 4+ assessments (we live in North London). Also I feel it would be too confusing and unsettling for her if we took her out. She has a friend starting next term which might result in her liking preschool more. The other part of me thinks I won't get this time back.

I chose this preschool over other nurseries as it is a nurturing and lovely place. However 5 mornings a week when I don't work the full week seems a bit much.

What do you mumsnetters think?

[mamalovebird]

I don't live in London so not sure about 4+ assessments but you are spot on when you say you don't get the time back. When my DS started school it took a lot of getting used to. No days off here and there, rigid holidays, I miss it. School rules!

I work 3 days and my dd is with me on my days off. I am going to make the most of the time we have to do stuff before she starts school too.

[PotteringAlong]

On the other hand, I send my DS when I'm off. It means I get time with the little ones and DS gets ready for the leap to school.

[mamalovebird]

My dd is 2.5 so I'm not even thinking about prepping for school yet. When she's 6 months off starting I'll probably up her days from 3 days to 3 days + 1 or 2 half days but school is a long way off yet.

All I'm saying is don't wish it away.

[Doubleespressostat]

Thank you for your replies.
Mamalovebird- I agree it's very early days. If it wasn't for the 4+ assessments (they are assessed the Winter / Spring before reception), I would've started her next September (a year before reception). Her preschool prepares her for it as they apparently know what often comes up.

I'm in a quandary! I'm not sure if I should take her out of preschool and try and do the 4+ prep myself and hope she gets in and then maybe restart preschool 6 months before school to get her ready. Or continue with preschool as she probably has a better chance of getting in!

Thank you for your thoughts so far.

[FishenNuggets]

I do this with my DS. He loves preschool and would much rather spend time there than with me. I use my spare mornings to get jobs done eg washing, cleaning, dinner started, gardening so that hopefully the time we spend together is better.

Also his preschool is term time only so in the school holidays we have those full days together, so we still spend a good bit of time together then.

Maybe once her friend starts she'll like it more?

I figure I can also always take him out for the odd day if I want to, and I'm going to pop in as a helper on one of my days off as well, which I'm looking forward to!

[HSMMaCM]

I was going to say what fish said. Occasional days off pre school are fine and can you offer to go in and help? Or will your pre school let you just use 3 days a week? You don't get fined for taking days off during term time at pre school, so you can take as many days off as you like. Let them know when you're not coming, so they can make a note of it.

[Ragwort]

I was a SAHM yet still sent my DS to nursery/playschool from 2ys - he is an only child and in my opinion loved the opportunity to mix with other children and adults and do all sorts of activities that perhaps we wouldn't get to do at home - I loved having time to myself to do voluntary work/hobbies/whatever I wanted to. There was plenty of time in the school holidays/weekends to spend 'quality time together'.

He enjoyed going so much that he would cry when I picked him up .

[Artandco]

I would reduce days personally. She's only two. My eldest only went to nursery the January before starting that September ( so just Jan-July nursery). He was almost 4. He goes to a pre prep school and was fine on starting and at same level as those who went to nursery for 2 years.

I would do 3 days your at work for now. Maybe 4 days next summer/ September, and 5 days the following January. You might have to pay for 5 mornings though in London to keep your place.

[dementedpixie]

I am a sahm mum and both mine went 5 mornings a week from age 3 as that was their free hours.

[Applesforjam]

Thanks for your replies
I think I will continue with preschool and take her out a few days a term to do something nice together. I must admit, those free mornings are lovely. I think she will enjoy it more with her friend joining soon.

Unfortunately, there's no chance of helping out - sounds lovely **Fish!
Really good to hear about all your different suggestions and set ups.