Advice please!

[Lalala82]

I've been a long time lurker but never started a thread, however I need a bit of advice please! I had my ds this year at 30+0. He was completely unexpected (extremely fast labour no concerns in pregnancy and I'd gone overdue with my ds previous). We spent almost 8weeks in hospital and there were several concerns but he's discharged now and totally fine as far as we can tell- just reflux but we are on ranitidine currently with some improvement. I have good days and not such good days- I have both children at home with me and my older child is 2.10 and so obvs spend lots of time entertaining etc. I have good friends in the area but no family although lots of support from there. I feel like I'm getting lower as he gets older. That sound really weird- he's over 5 months actual now and it's great but I'm just sad quite a bit. Did any of you have 'emotional hangovers' from premature birth and are there any good support places out there? If you've got this far then thanks!

[CakeRattleandRoll]

Hi Lalala. My DS was born at 30 + 4. Like you, he had 8 weeks in hospital, but no real concerns, just very small (2lb 6oz at birth). He is 3yo now, bright, boisterous, chatty and still very small.

I don't recall having any particularly sad feelings in the months after his birth. However, I did develop anxiety during the pregnancy, so I was already taking sertraline (which is also used to treat depression) when he was born.

I think it would be worth speaking to your GP, especially as you say you are feeling lower as time goes on. Don't assume it will just go away and don't feel guilty/weird about feeling that way. Hopefully you also have family/friends in RL that you can speak to. I'm not in the UK, so can't suggest any particular support places, but hope you feel better soon.

[AbbeyRoadCrossing]

I had / have an emotional hangover. I think more from the birth experience. It did get better but then reappeared when pregnant again so I'm now seeing a psychologist that specialises in birth trauma, luckily for me on the NHS.
I think it does kind of hit you a while later as at the time I was just getting through / managing if that makes sense? Then when things are normal I thought about it properly.

[WhatKatyDidnt]

Yes. In the first year after coming home I was elated, because she had survived. But at 15 months ish it all hit me. I carried on for a while then realised I needed some help. I had counselling (with a neonatal specialist, which I thought was important). It helped greatly.

[Happylass1]

Yes like Whatkatydidnt i was ok but then when i got pregnant again it hit me and i suffered with anxiety. I saw a couseller which helped a lot and was looking into CBT but then had the baby- this time a bit later but still premature. This time the birth was better and because i was expecting to go early it was ok. But i will be keeping a close eye on myself in case the anxiety comes back. Do talk to someone hun