First Timers! - Things you wish youd known/know VS Things youd recommend. All welcome.

[FlowerBee]

Hi There,

Am starting this thread for mainly all the first timers (especially those without mates or family up the duff) who are struggling a bit with this pregnancy malark.

Since I'm relatively athletic and down-to-earth, I always thought I'd take to pregnancy like a duck to water (and look much like Gisele Angelina Jolie in the process) but in hindsight would have been very happy for a stalk to drop off the baby (is that still available thru Interflora?).

Things I wish I'd known in advance, and still want to know...

1. You can get something called Hyperemesis - which is a miserable 10 week jail-sentence involving a bucket/toilet/hospital and hunger-induced dreams involving talking/dancing chips.
2. Sex will be affected, no matter how hot/highly sexed you were before. Get used to it (the compensation is horny dreams involving virtually everyone).
3. There is no straigforward answer to What is the best way to give birth? (see stalk) BUT everyone who has given birth will have a resolute opinion that what they did was best (and elective caesareans are as popular as boiling baby rabbits)
4. I still don't know whether to

a. Join NCT classes and pay £239
b. Join hypnobirthing classes and pay £275
c. Buy a book/cd on hypnobirthing and pay £39.99
d. Attend NHS antenatal classes
e. Cry (any advice appreciated!)

1. It?s impossible to know what will fit your newborn baby at the hospital as it is impossible to know how big it will be. Newborn, tiny baby, 0-1 months, 0-3 months ? it's anyones guess - and baby will end up with more clothes than you before you can say "poky-outy-belly-button"
2. No one gives up their seat for you on the Tube, ever. I thought this would be one of the most magical experiences of being pregnant. It doesn't happen. But people do stare at your freaky proportions more.

Things I'd recommend

1. H and M maternity leggings cost around a tenner and are the most comfortable and versatile bit of maternity kit ever - a godsend, and I never wore leggings before getting pregnant (I have a fear of the 80s)
2. Prenatal Yoga - options for anything athletic vanish with MS, tiredness, increasing girth, and threat of the hormone relaxin warping joints, but I have found yoga classes wonderful for giving me a bit of sanity and creating a bit more space for baby and organs in my abdomen. Also our teacher is a sweetheart with plenty of non-judgemental advice.
3. Repeating the mantra - I will lose the weight, I will lose the weight - and fantasising about running again with or without the latest designer buggy, meanwhile eating Twix bars, Easter eggs, Indian takeaways.
4. Embrace shiny, thicker hair or any positive you happen to come across as they are few and far between ? so far you?ve got thru vomiting, heart-burn, piles, scaly skin, spotty skin, stretched skin, fat deposits on bottom/thighs, waddling (and the best/agonizing childbirth is yet to come)
5. Buy Baby Shoes - ones for 0-3 months that he/she won't ever need for walking..or the equivalent frivolous buy...because they are so so cute when you measure them up to ur bump and remind urself what you're doing all this for.

Anyone else with any recommendations/words of wisdom/things they want to know/wish they'd known feel free to rant...!

[LLJ4]

5. It?s impossible to know what will fit your newborn baby at the hospital as it is impossible to know how big it will be. Newborn, tiny baby, 0-1 months, 0-3 months ? it's anyones guess - and baby will end up with more clothes than you before you can say "poky-outy-belly-button"

Best advice I was given:

-Go to Nearly New Sale or Primark.
-Get a packet of vests and babygros in each of "Early Baby", "Newborn", and "0-1".
-Put one vest and one babygro (same size) in a sandwich bag. Label bag with size of outfit.
-Put a couple of the first two sizes of sandwich bag in hospital bag.
-When you pass 37w, add last size.
-After you give birth, midwife will ask OH to get the baby's clothes. Tell him to get out one of each. Midwife will choose.

To be honest, DS was 8lb9oz and wore "up to 7lb" for weeks. The "7-9lb" stuff swamped him.

1. People only notice you are pregnant when you don't want them to: "Wow, you're enormous! Are you sure it's not twins?!"

1. Morning sickness ain't a morning thing.

[LLJ4]

Oh yeah, and...

1. Sleep while you still can. Even if there's something good on telly and you're in slow labour and you're excited.

[FourEyesGood]

Breastfeeding isn't as easy as the books suggest (at least, it wasn't for me and quite a few other mums I know), but Lansinoh nipple cream really made things easier and you can get it free on prescription (otherwise it's about a tenner!).

[millingtonsmummy]

On the subject of getting a seat on the tube, it gets worse when it's your 2nd and people don't offer to help you carry your toddler filled buggy down the stairs despite a 7mth pregnancy bump. I've stuck to buses since that journey!

And sorry to be the bearer of bad news but enjoy your thick shiny hair while it lasts, unfortunately it's likely to come out in clumps when your hormones have finished with you!

[RunningGuerita]

Thanks Flowerbee for your post. I have nothing useful to add, am also pregnant with my first and only 15 +3.

I am also finding being pregnant hard work but luckily I have a wonderful DH and understanding work colleagues so am managing well.

I haven't decided the best approach on NCT classes or hypno birthing, am interested in both. Friends have told me the content of the free hospital NHS antenatal classes was better than the NCT ones but they went to the NCT classes to meet other mums to be.

Good luck to you!

[ellasmum1]

don't buy crappy maternity pads- big wide comfy tena lady pads are the BEST!
And NEVER use always thin type pads following childbirth.

[supergreenuk]

Agrees with ellasmum1.

Don't bother buying a bedding set. Your not allowed to use the quilt or the bumper. Just get some cot sheets....it's all you need.

Don't rush to get your cot as baby sleeps in moses basket for months.

You will bleed for weeks.

@ millingtonsmummy..... that explains why my hair is falling out loads. I was starting to get worried. There is hair EVERYWHERE. grrr

[ellasmum1]

ooh yeah agree totally about the bedding set, use grobags and then you only need bottom sheets!