Home birth with DC3 at 40?

[dazedandconfused]

At my maternity check-up this morning, the midwife asked whether I would consider a homebirth as I am 'low-risk' due to 2 straightforward natural deliveries with DS and DD. This time I'm 6 years older, and I thought that would rule me out so I hadn't given it much thought. Also think it might make DH nervous. But now that it's been mentioned, I feel quite keen on the idea, with the option to tranfer to hospital if any complications come up.

However, just had an annoying phone call with my mum who was anxious about the idea and reminded me that my labour with DC1 was very long ... Why are people so negative about it? Grrr. Any thoughts from others on the home birth option?

[amistillsexy]

I had 2 wonderful homebirths after a hospital birth for DS1. I was 38 and 39 for my homebirths and my age was never an issue.
DS1 was an incredibly long labour (38 hrs), most of which was at home. The worst bit was getting off my lovely bed to be driven to hospital!
I loved the comfort of birthing at home, the fact that the other child/ren were there as soon as baby was born (they slept during each birth...good planning!), and I felt wonderfully empowered by it...like I'd done something amazing!

[lia66]

I am 39+ days and am planning hb.

I am 44 and this baby number 6, never had hb before due to always having had pg complications. Have to say cons wasn't thrilled but after reassuring them I wasn't about to take stupid risks for the sake of getting "the perfect birth" they are being supportive.

Their concerns at my (plus40 yrs) age is excessive bleeding they tell me. I am about 15 mins from hosp.

I am real;ly looking forward to it now. Hope it goes well for you. :)

[babyfour]

I had a fabulous homebirth with my dc3 at age 40. I had a very long labour with dc1 too, although dc2 only took 2.5hours.

dc3 took 1.5 hours and arrived nearly at the same time at the midwife! It was a fabulous experience. I am so glad that I got the opportunity to have a homebirth and would love to do it again if I got the opportunity (now age 43).

I hope you get your homebirth and a wonderful uncomplicated labour and birth.

[bumble34]

dc1 hospital birth 4.5 hrs aged 18
dc2 planned home birth 32hrs at home 2hrs in hospital aged 36
dc3 due this summer planning another homebirth.

Even though dc2 was finally born in hospital being at home for so long and having one to one care from midwife throughout established labour was fantastic

my dp was nervous about home birth until i talked to him about it Once he knew that we would have 2 midwives and all the necessary equipment and would transfer to hospiatl at the first signs of any problems he felt much better.

Read up on it and get as much information as you can? If you plan for a homebirth you can always change your mind but if you don't you have no choice but to go to hospital

[girlfromdownsouth]

Hi dazed
Well I will be 40 when DC3 is born in July and am planning a home birth. It has also been 6 years since I last gave birth. My other 2 were straight forward and low risk. They were also born at home at age 31 and age 33.

I too had never considered it before the NCT lady mentioned it and luckily the midwives supported me in my decision despite it being my 1st child. I made it clear that I was prepared to go into hospital if needs be (10mins away at most) and that assured them.

DD was a long back to back labour but I managed with no pain relief, just accupressure massage.

DS was much quicker, but had been breech at 38wks. They mentioned c/s to me then but a doctor managed to turn him round so hb went ahead as planned.

Am hoping DC3 will go to plan with hb.

I had wonderful hb experiences and can highly recommend them, however, I have got no experience of giving birth in hospital. I liked the fact that I could go at my own pace and was in my own environment. I am not big on medical intervention (unless necessary). BTW I refused the syntocin injections and my placentas came out almost immediately with no problems.

Good Luck

[frankenonsense]

I have had 3 home births, the last one age 40. Your age should not be an issue- your medical history and how you feel about doing it at home should be. Have you done some reading around , maybe get some info to reassure your DH and mum? My family don't like it which is why we do not talk about it and as I had to transfer to hospital for the last one I have not talked to them about the birth as I feel they will be all "told you so".

You should be thinking around how long would you be prepared to wait for a midwife to come out, what pain relief would you want? Make a birth plan and make sure to discuss all the options with your community midwife.It might be an idea to take DH to the appointment to discuss what he is anxious about- complications? Resuss? Baby arriving before midwife? Childcare if you have to transfer? There is a book for homebirth dads www.homebirthbook.com/1.html if you can obtain a copy.

Go for a water birth if you can- one pro of homebirth is not worrying if you can get a pool! And it is absolutely worth it right after the birth to be able to sleep properly in your own bed with the baby, everything you need close to hand, your own bathroom etc, no visiting hours, being looked after by your own family , let it all hang out for breastfeeding, etc.

[dazedandconfused]

Thanks for all these wonderful and encouraging replies! I did quite a bit of reading about HB with first 2 DCs but chickened out because I had such a long and difficult labour with DS - he was a 10lber so maybe no wonder.

I stayed at home as long as poss with DD and was only in hospital for 1.5 hrs when she was born. However, I hated the journey and when I arrived at hospital they didn't have a room available so I was left in the corridor in full labour for an hour. When I finally got into the labour room I have this memory of being on my knees on a plastic sheet on the hard floor and wishing so much that someone would give me a cushion - but I was too far gone to be able to communicate this to anyone. The thought of being on my own bed/sofa/floor is very appealing!

Maybe because the actual moment(s) of birth was pretty excruciating, and I had to have stitches both times ... this has also partly put me off HB because I'm nervous of that level of pain at home, for some reason. However, from what people have said, I imagine I'd be much more relaxed with a HB and so the pain wouldn't be so bad.

DP's worries are partly being nervous about risks, but also the chaos of having this going on at home when we have 2 DCs, (one SN with Aspergers). But I have arranged our lovely childminer to come anyway, and she only lives a couple of streets away and could take the children there. Or they may be asleep or at school.

We live in a flat so not sure what the birth pool situation would be, but at least we have a v big bath so that would be an option.

Thanks again, ladies. Really inspiring stories and I'm going to read up about it.

[ragged]

Had a homebirth with DC4 at age 40. That was after a small pph with DC3, too.
No problems, no regrets!