How many accidents are acceptable for a boy, 4y and 2mo?

[schroedingersdodo]

I'd like to know your responses before I start ranting about DS1.

Thanks!

[Skiingmaniac]

Acceptable? Anywhere between 0-1000000
Good luck!

[superbagpuss]

more hits then misses I would think

at that age my boys were dry 6 days out of 7. all accidents I found reasons for (too long playing, didn't like using a public toilet etc)

[misssmapp]

Mine would often leave it too late, so would often have accidents when trying to pull trousers down in the loo.

[biscuitsandbandages]

Any number is acceptable if things are moving forwards and there ia awareness. If things are regressing or failing to improve even occasional accidents are frustrating.

Ds 1 and 2 would not have daytime accidents at that age but would at night every few months.

[schroedingersdodo]

Well, things are regressing. He has most accidents at home. Just can't be bothered to go to the loo. If i take him to the loo, sometimes he screams, says there is no wee, and them leaves a pint in the loo... Other times he just accepts the suggestion and goes.

It's so frustrating.

[biscuitsandbandages]

Not always a popular option on mn but get him to help you clean it up?

Obviously important to exclude medical issues but if its can't be bothered ness then reward chart fpr a dry day combined with natural consequences may help.

If he has an accident he has to go get himself changed and help you tidy up. My 4 year olds could strip their own beds and get changed so some help with kitchen roll shouldnt be beyond him.

[biscuitsandbandages]

With the no wee thing.... we had a phase of that I remember and I didnt argue with him (was ds2) just would say ok, fair enough but go and check anyway. Gave him a chance to save face and we werent arguing about his body (wee or no wee) we were arguing about my rules (going to check when I told him to)

[addictedtosugar]

DS1 has just finished reception.
I'd say for the first 2 terms, we probably had an accident a half term at school, and probably similar at home. I asked at parents evening, and apparently once a week would start to be cause for concern at school. about to curse us now we seem to have been OK for the past 3-4 months.

We too do the, you don't need to wee, but you need to sit on the toilet before we XYZ

[schroedingersdodo]

I do make him help with the cleaning, and get new clothes and dress himself. It makes no difference whatsoever.

Sometimes I forget to tell him to go to the loo, that's when accidents happen.

I think I have to be more patient.

Thanks a lot. It's a relief to know that children still have accidents in Reception :)

[Echo7726]

This thread has hit a chord with me! Our ds is 4 years and also appears not to be bothered about going to the loo. Today we've had one wee and one poo accident. Accidents often happen when we forget to remind him frequently, but equally he can have an accident just after being asked to go and having him insisting he doesn't need to, even after he's been sat on the toilet.

We've been potty training for over a year and to be honest I'm getting very anxious about what will happen when he starts school come September as I think he might have more than one accident per week unless we get a break through in August.

We do treats when he remembers and consequences (such as no TV) when he forgets, we've tried reward charts however it doesn't seem to offset the short term advantage in him not having to run to the toilet. I'm not sure I could manage the mess of him cleaning himself up!

We've seen the health visitor, spoken with nursery but we are running out of ideas on how to get him to understand that toilet training matters. I just hate the thought that he'll be stigmatised with this when he starts school .

[schroedingersdodo]

Echo, I have a feeling we won't have accidents at school. I may be completely wrong, as I don't know your child, but he probably make an effort to avoid the embarrassment. My Ds has fewer accidents when hebis with friends.

[Echo7726]

Thanks yes hopefully the new environment will encourage them to remember...