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Is your child ready for potty training at nursery? Here's the place for all your toilet training questions.

Potty training

Had enough (me I mean)

9 replies

PigeonPair · 11/04/2011 13:55

I'm only on Day 2 of training. DS was a doddle - a week of staying in and he had it! DD is a different matter and I am tearing my hair out and doing all the wrong things no doubt, due to sheer frustration!! DD is 2y9m and I would say that in some ways she has been "ready" for a good few months. However she seems to have a fear of the potty and toilet (common I know)and following a few stressful "sits" (ie. before bathtime) I decided to leave it until now.

She has had no accidents but only two tiny (about a tblsp) wees in the potty and I think this was because she was crying so much!. I am panicking she will get an infection if she keeps holding it in (although her nappy was soaking this morning and wet after yesterdays lunchtime nap so it is coming out).

I don't know what to do. I am slightly of the view that once the nappies are off, they stay off, come what may but I don't want to traumatise her and I have already shouted at her a couple of times today . I don't know whether she just doesn't "get" what she is supposed to (although she tells me when she is about to do a wee in her nappy) or if she is scared. Any thoughts/advice?

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TheVisitor · 11/04/2011 13:57

She may be physically ready, but she sounds nowhere near emotionally ready. The fact that you're shouting at her means that you need to put a nappy back on her and wait a couple of months. Leave the clean potty around for playing with and familiarity, but stop training before it comes a massive battle and issue.

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TanteRose · 11/04/2011 14:00

I put DD back in nappies, when she really didn't "get" it...(brain not connected to bladder). We talked more and SHE decided that she would try again on her 3rd birthday. Birthday morning came, and she went straight to the loo, had a wee, and put her cotton pants on for the day!

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jetgirl · 11/04/2011 14:10

Back in the nappies I would say. I have just started potty-training DS at 3 and a half, 4th attempt. This time it's going really well because he is into it, previous attempts resulted in constant accidents and DS screaming for a nappy because he hated being wet. He was terrified of wetting himself even though I was way more chilled about the process than I had been with DD (who trained at 2 and a half).

One thing I read on another thread was something along the lines of 'no-one will ask on a job interview at what age you were potty-trained'!

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PigeonPair · 11/04/2011 14:18

I think I am just shocked that it is so much harder this time around. Also I started a diet today, am premenstrual and worried about my lovely sister who is having a mamogram as we speak. Not the best situation to start it off! DS was only 2 and a half but I think it's a bit easier with boys as they can actually see where the wee comes from! I will give it another day and may have to think about putting the nappies on. I really didn't want to do that but would hate for her to get a complex about the whole thing! No point in us both getting stressed and upset about it.

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jetgirl · 11/04/2011 15:28

I was surprised that it was harder second time round too. I thought I had learnt all the lessons with DD. Well I had, but DS wasn't to know that! I think I just thought he would follow his sister and put up with the process for a couple of weeks, but he was much more stressed about it until now. I never thought I would say this: I am enjoying potty-training this time round, probably because none of us are stressed.

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jetgirl · 11/04/2011 15:29

Hope your sister is ok too.

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pinkytheshrinky · 11/04/2011 15:42

My two dds were completely done and dusted at 2 years and my ds is 2 yrs and 3 months and is not even remotely interested - clever boy that he is sits on the loo trying to persuade me to put a nappy on.

The better weather is coming to nappies off and winkies out for the Summer but I have the feeling we are going to get nowhere at all until he wants to do it.... seems i have forgotten all i knew about potty training - i sense a battle of epic proportion

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Poogles · 11/04/2011 16:04

DS2 turns 3 at the end of this month. Up until a few weeks ago he ran from the room screaming if you even mentioned the word potty so we didn't bother to push the potty training as he clearly wasn't ready. Whilst in the bath with his brother he announced that he needed a poo so we grabbed him out of the bath and managed to coax him to sit on the potty. He didn't do anything (until we put a nappy on him) but we gave him a reward (milky bar) for sitting on the potty for the first time. Next bath time, he got out the bath and asked to sit on the potty. This time we got a wee.

As we are due to go on holiday at the beginning of May I decided 'we' weren't ready for potty training (didn't want to confuse him by going to pants & back to nappies - don't trust him to get out of pool to go if he's having fun) but we have put him in pull ups. He has now potty trained himself in that over the last week or so we have only had 2 wet nappies!

Anyway, point I am trying to make is that your DD doesn't seem ready yet but I'm sure she will get there in her own time! It can be frustrating - especially when people (i.e. MIL!!!) tell you that they had trained their children the moment they came out the womb!!! Try not to stress!

By the way, we had a nightmare trying to train DS1 who decided he wouldn't do it till he was ready which is why we took a more relaxed approach this time. He did get it at 2.9 but I was a stress ball by then!! Hope this helps!