I know I'm probably going to get some abuse for this post but I don't know where else to turn.
I have a 2 year old and 7 week old and both are boys. When I found out my youngest was a boy at 18 weeks I left the scan feeling like I had nothing to look forward to now. My pregnancy had been so different and I desperately wanted a little girl. When we walked out of the scan room my OH just said sorry and that set me off.
I spent days on end crying only to end up with my husband just telling me to get rid of it then! He couldn't understand why I was so upset.
All the excitement had gone, I didn't need to go shopping for anything at all which I felt was all part of the experience of having a baby (along with all the kicks etc of course). Some days I would be OK about it then others I would just spend my days in tears. I couldn't even look at girls clothes without feeling mad or upset.
Then at 30 weeks OHs sister who I don't see eye to eye with finds out she's having a girls and my whole world seemed to come crashing down again. I knew that once this happened his family wouldn't care about my baby as much and it happened and is still happening now before her child gets here.
When my son was born I was ok for a few days until I saw the way everyone was with him and I felt like crap all over again.
Please don't confuse my disappointment with me not loving him because I do, very much so. I just can't get over this. He's been a horrible sleeper, hard to settle and we've had so many more issues than my first and I can't help but feel like this is my punishment.
It hurts so much, especially when people you don't know say things like 'oh I feel sorry for mum, those 3 will always be doing things together while your sat at home'!
All the relationships I have seen between mothers and sons either have them living miles apart and barely talking or very estranged. This is something else that leaves me upset because I feel like that once they've left the home that's it and I won't see that much of them.
We always said we wanted more than two children but now I've got 2 boys and I'm absolutely positive I can't cope with a third since I'm struggling with 2.
I thought it would all go away once he was born and it hasn't. Please can someone tell me how I can get past this.
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Postnatal health
Gender Disappointment help needed
21 replies
user1466337901 · 19/06/2016 13:13
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